| The second poem actually gives quite a bit of insight regarding his situation. Translation from Chinese to English is hard and much is lost in translation. I'll translate the following to prose as to minimize what's lost in the translation: 《冲突》
"Conflict" 他们都说
They all say 我是个话很少的孩子
I'm a child of few words 对此我并不否认
This I don't deny 实际上
But actually 我说与不说
Whether I speak or not 都会跟这个社会
With this society I'll still 发生冲突
Conflict "They've always told me that I was a quiet child. I do not deny that fact, however, whether I speak up or not doesn't alter the fact that I feel incompatible with this society." The main beef I have with the translation is that conflict is a very explicit word whereas Chinese is much more implicit. It's pretty obvious that there was a large disconnect with what he wanted out of society vs reality. This is unfortunately quite common in China. Being someone who grew up reading Chinese novels extensively, I can attest that the culture itself is heavily romanticized and when compared to the modern subversion influenced by the communist party, it's figuratively night and day. |
《冲突》 "Collision, Rushing to a"
他们都说 The people are always talking, speculating
我是个话很少的孩子 That I'm a man-child, a little bit morose, have little to show for in the discipline of twisting tongue
对此我并不否认 To their accusation I won't deny nor recant,
实际上 But I'll instead declare that in reality, (not on their verbal plane),
我说与不说 I choose to speak to not speak - might as well cut my tongue,
都会跟这个社会 I have computed all possible scenario's of their word games and foresaw,
发生冲突 All interactions rushing on the freeway, en-route to their collisions.