| I'm guessing English is not your first language. The site is littered with dozens of grammatical errors. "Your website is like a leaking hole. And it's leaking customers with bunches of money." - awkward. ..."we will make your website 'money printing machine' for your business." - _a_ money printing machine "And this is what you will get: more revenue and more customers." - awkward "Less then 3% users buy your product." Less THAN 3% OF users... "Why other 97% don't by from you?" Why DON'T THE other 97% BUY from you? "Research is primary thing we do for our clients." -too simplistic. "And we do this to confidently understand you." - this is a strange transition, and an awkward sentence. "every solution we apply to your Online Business is because data showed us to do that. " - very awkward "Every Action of them" - what? "There is going to be a lot of complex information collected, but we will process it and make it visual and clear. Not only we will benefit from this intelligent data - you too will, comfortably sitting in the chair, see how is your business functioning anytime and anywhere." - rewrite this entire paragraph, it's a mess. The "Survey & Feedback" box is a complete disaster, so I'll just put the worst of it here... rewrite the whole thing: "We will setup infrastructure for communicating with any person visiting your website." - awkward "Why the customer haven't bought anything and left?" - ??? Find out why customers left without making a purchase. "Before, you just haven't knew, but now when you are working with us, it's not an answer anymore." - I... don't even know, I think you mean it's not a question anymore? And "just haven't knew" should be something like 'you had no idea'... but the whole sentence here is... not good. "If he leaves - we will know why. If he buys something - good - but we still need to know why." Don't use gender-specific pronouns. "Because those decisions determines if you will get CC number or not." - not only is this incorrect on several levels English-wise, but that's really not how you want to refer to "closing a sale." The way it's written sounds more like you're skimming credit card numbers for fraudulent purposes To be continued... |
"How much time do you loose on unnecessary features?" - LOSE
"Maybe huge part of your customers don't buy it because your product don't have some small feature. Don't worry. We will find out this." - We can identify scenarios in which some customers don't purchase a product for lack of a small feature.
"Every change in your website is firstly tested with small count of people. And only when it's successful, we show this change for all your visitors. So you are safe." We test each change with a small portion of users, and show it to everyone only once we have used the data gathered to determine it is beneficial.
"At the time when we will finish, even you will be astonished with the results and happily counting money you are going to earn every month, the job for you will not have been finished, because your goal is to grow, grow, grow!" - When we finish, you'll be astonished with the results. Your job isn't over yet, but you'll be well on the way to incredible revenue growth.
"We understand this, so we will pass on to you all the infrastructure we will have been prepared. Even more, we will teach your team to continue our work with it and consistently have better and better results." - We understand that your business keeps moving even after we're done improving your website. We'll provide all the resources your team needs to ensure consistent growth, month after month, year after year.
....WHEW....
I did my best to try and give you some more natural/native English sounding copy here, hopefully this will be a good starting point!