[chacham15]

About having a predefined script of things to say: we all have them, whether or not you realize this consciously is a separate matter. It might be a bit disingenuous to use such a script, but that slight is less important if the conversation doesnt feel disingenuous. The only difference to the other participant is whether or not he knows of the disingenuousness. That is a cost which, however, can also be offset by potential gains. In this case, the gain is sympathy. People, in most conversations today, remain remarkably distant and non caring.

For example, contrast how the following two sentences make you feel: "That sounds hard" and "I don't know much about that line of work, what sort of challenges do you face?" The first sympathizes with you whereas the second is more interrogatory which distances the speaker. The first is something a friend might say and the second is something an interviewer might say. Lastly, the line isnt meant to be a literal script pages long, but rather as an icebreaker to make this person feel like they can talk to you without being interrogated. Where the conversation goes after that is completely unknown. This is also the logic behind trying to put off asking "what do you do", because you again become an interviewer.