I'm living in Japan at the moment (language student) and it is certainly different here compared to the west. For example in Silicon Valley it is acceptable to pretty much give up a college education for a startup. In East-Asia, that is shunned upon except perhaps in Taiwan. For Japan particularly, there is a "set path" of being normal/average and deviating from that path causes people to look negatively on you. For example people that only do "part time" work in Japan are considered freeters (free-timers) and not necessarily contributing to society.
Another significant things about east-asian work ethics especially Japanese, is that the rank system is still in place when it comes to corporate structures. For the typical Japanese, that means in order to be a "good" employee, you need to show up to work before your boss arrives and leave after he leaves, even if you have nothing to work on. Furthermore, after-work drinking parties with the boss are considered slightly below mandatory, you can decline the invitation but your boss will get the impression that if you do, you aren't a "good employee".
Finally death from overwork here is real. The general strategy here is if you're failing, you aren't working long enough hours. That's different from the west because if you combine that with the notion that you are more of a servant than a creator or contributor, then you suddenly end up with zombies instead of employees doing meaningful, creative work. More work general works if feedback and criticism is accepted on all levels, here that isn't the case.
The nail in the coffin is this is pretty much accepted by everyone thus if you don't accept it, you are seen as the "weird" one. Individuality is often not a good thing here. That means your Japanese wife tending to the children at home will become incredibly disappointed with you if you don't "succeed" in this system. There is an expectation that you'll more or less be the cash cow for the family otherwise you're useless.
That is certainly the norm but it is not universal. There are certainly individuals that do not follow this pattern but, unfortunately, you are unlikely to ever meet them if you have a more conventional existence.
For example, I am a computer programmer, mid 30s, I have a wife and child and I work 20 hours a week, 25 absolute max. I've been working reduced hours for almost three years. I also work remotely so we spend most of our time in places like Thailand and Malaysia (warm, good food, low cost of living) although we will shortly be heading over to spend a few months in Europe.
And we are not the only ones. Most of our social circle is composed of similar people. If you go places like Chiang Mai in Thailand it is crawling with westerners carving out an existence that involves a high quality of life and personal control over how much and when they perform income generating activities.
Unfortunately if you are in the 9-5 routine yourself you will never meet any of us.
Another significant things about east-asian work ethics especially Japanese, is that the rank system is still in place when it comes to corporate structures. For the typical Japanese, that means in order to be a "good" employee, you need to show up to work before your boss arrives and leave after he leaves, even if you have nothing to work on. Furthermore, after-work drinking parties with the boss are considered slightly below mandatory, you can decline the invitation but your boss will get the impression that if you do, you aren't a "good employee".
Finally death from overwork here is real. The general strategy here is if you're failing, you aren't working long enough hours. That's different from the west because if you combine that with the notion that you are more of a servant than a creator or contributor, then you suddenly end up with zombies instead of employees doing meaningful, creative work. More work general works if feedback and criticism is accepted on all levels, here that isn't the case.
The nail in the coffin is this is pretty much accepted by everyone thus if you don't accept it, you are seen as the "weird" one. Individuality is often not a good thing here. That means your Japanese wife tending to the children at home will become incredibly disappointed with you if you don't "succeed" in this system. There is an expectation that you'll more or less be the cash cow for the family otherwise you're useless.