[cryptophile]

I do not believe that marrying the "wrong person" is fundamentally that common. The problem is rather that it could be simple and easy to divorce someone for the inevitable quirks that you do not want to learn to put with.

That is why I have never considered and would never consider to marry a woman from a mainstream western community. The fact that it is culturally an easy option to move on, turns them into unsuitable marriage material. I would just be getting into an accident waiting to happen.

Prince Charles and lady Diana only divorced because it was culturally acceptable and rather easy to do. Otherwise, they would still be married today. Especially Diana would have learned how to deal with the drawbacks of that, and probably not be more unhappy for it.

[halhen]

As a newly divorced mainstream western person, I might have an anecdotal perspective on this. You don't divorce because of how easy it is. You divorce despite how hard it is. And while the cultural boundaries are reasonable (not encouraging, mind you), it is the finances, the practical things, the emotions, the social consequences that hurt. And, if you have kids, rip their opportunity to live in the same house as both parents.

My divorce was a "good" one. We agreed, and make the best of it together, not just for the kids' sake but for each other's as well. Still, I never wanna do this again.

According to other people I've talked to, the books I've read, and the therapists I've been to, the idea that couples divorce too easily is simply false. I'm sure you can find examples to point to, but, at least around the Nordics, it simply is not the case.

If you marry a woman who would divorce you in a wink, the reason is you not getting to know her beforehand, not some divorce-culture.

[sheepmullet]

"According to other people I've talked to, the books I've read, and the therapists I've been to, the idea that couples divorce too easily is simply false."

I don't think it is about how "easy" it is. It's about when is divorce considered the "right thing"? In the west we often consider divorce the right option based on feelings and desires. Don't settle. You have the right to be happy etc.

[jl6]

Does that mean men from a mainstream western community are unsuitable marriage material too?