[silencio]

Surprised you're still commenting...

My husband and I also recently got married (congrats to you and your partner from us!) and we designed our rings from scratch - mine with a diamond alternative stone - as seen here: http://cl.ly/image/3A3R24042w0C. PeterGriffin would probably proceed to tell us that our rings are still just garbage sentimental trinkets distracting us from the "substance" of our relationship despite us "making stories" with them.

Nothing about spending the money to get our rings says that we can't also honor what the rings stand for by doing other things. Doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. That doesn't even come into the equation.

The same could be said about names - you can choose to keep a name due to an attachment while also honoring the origin of the name. This is why I'm just adding more onto my name instead of removing any bit of the name that my parents gave me. (My nickname is longer than my real name, even. My real name is a little too short.)

Ultimately it's a personal decision, and ultimately, like you point out, it's a matter of basic respect to respect someone's choice of name and name pronunciation. Nothing about a choice to be attached to something means that you're stuck "telling stories" and that you're forever doomed to be attracted to the symbol and not the substance.

I am actually quite saddened by the idea of someone living such a life. "Robotic" is kind of an understatement.

[PeterGriffin]

No I'm actually impressed you designed your own rings. In another setting that would certainly be worth a nice conversation over lunch or dinner with you and your husband.

Maybe my reaction is... beyond understanding... (cue in spooky music).

Also don't confuse "robotic" with my lack of focus on stupid things. I laugh, cry, hate and love a lot too. I can't understand why I need to be a stupid son of a bitch getting hung up on how people pronounce my name or getting overly attached to small shiny commercial objects, in order to do those things.

I also don't believe in witches and black magic. Oh, how robotic.

[silencio]

Okay I admit I was surprised ;) I figured that wouldn't be enough of a maker story. We only did it because we were bored by all the identical unsuitable rings we encountered. If we were going to stick with one symbol for our lives, may as well be exactly what we wanted instead of settling.

The robotic part, I suppose, is a combination of your personal feelings on the matter while refusing to see why it may be a problem for others. Not having an attachment to your name by itself is a personal choice I can respect.

BTW if it's of any interest, my first name is Jane. My nickname is Janey. My longer than my full name nickname is "janeylicious". Funny how nobody fucks up the last one (except maybe the spelling) but I have so much trouble with my plain first name to the point that I occasionally just make up a different name or rely only on the nicknames. The plain name stuff can backfire ;)

[CocaKoala]

well wait, I'm confused; my wife worked with a jeweller to design my ring, and I worked with a jeweller to design her engagement ring and matching wedding band. Did we just roll over from "foolish to spend money on rings" to "it's okay because we designed them"? Or does that not count because we didn't make the wax, cast the metal, and set the stones ourselves?

I'm not calling you robot because you don't like to focus on things you think are stupid; I'm calling you robotic because you absolutely insist that anybody and everybody who DOES focus on things you think are stupid are stupid.