[benjamincburns]

We must read that quote in a very different tone.

To me he's highlighting a situation where he disagreed with someone in a way that made him angry, but instead of jumping on his anger and telling her to "take a hike" he chose to control his temper and employ empathy. He illustrates the benefit of this approach by saying that in the end both he and the person with whom he disagreed came away happy.

One of the core tenants of the book is that you shouldn't fake it. That is, when he tells you you should be interested in the benign and mundane things people have to say, he means that you should find something about what they're saying in which to take actual, genuine interest. He says time and time again that even people you perceive to be stupid are smarter than to be manipulated by false interest and empathy and that by employing such tactics you do a disservice to yourself and the people with whom you're interacting.

I agree that in some places the tone is a bit Machiavellian, but it's only to illustrate that even to one who would employ such tactics, being genuine is a far better approach than being fake.