[cafard]

You got turned down for college. That does not count as "such a failure".

These things happen. A kid in my neighborhood ended up sitting out a year. I would suggest that you go to the local community college. You might want to go part time and work, to have something else to think about besides school.

If you feel as if you need some space from your parents, you could join the Navy. They aren't going to stick you on a firebase in Afghanistan, they will clothe and feed and train you. The tech blogger Steve Yegge was in the Navy before he went to college, and I have relatives that did so.