[cturner]

   > Brendan went out of his way to donate a thousand dollars
   > to prevent a group of people from sharing the same right
   > as everyone else.

Right? The right to have a piece of paper from a government department endorsing the validity of your relationship with someone else? That's petty.

If you're in an alternative relationship and want to have a permanent union with someone else, or with several other people, you can go and draw up a contract and then get on with your lives. It could take as little as ten minutes. Contract law is fantastic like this.

Everything substantial is already available through contract law.

   > it's that he's trying to impose them on all of society.

Hypocrisy. Religious types who want to mandate how other people can live are off-key. But people who get carried away by the cause of gay marriage are equally ridiculous. You're playing the same game as the religious types. The missing piece of that expression of your political power enshrined in law - a political endorsement of certain relationships.

[rogerbinns]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rights_and_responsibilities_of...

> According to the United States Government Accountability Office (GAO), there are 1,138 statutory provisions[1] in which marital status is a factor in determining benefits, rights, and privileges. These rights were a key issue in the debate over federal recognition of same-sex marriage.

[cturner]

Interesting, thanks. I'm not in the US so my context is weak. My reaction would be to get rid of the provisions. In a free society, the government will have no role in the bedroom. Extending it into micromanaging relationships is a step in the wrong direction. The best code is the code we throw away.

[baconner]

The vast majority of rights that are bound to marriage in the us have nothing whatsoever to do with "the bedroom" but rather practical matters like visiting your chosen spouse in the hospital or not having your non-citizen spouse deported or receiving benefits if your spouse is killed while serving in the military. Another good example is the right to file taxes jointly which can have a huge impact on your joint income. Many of these things couldn't be covered by contract and even when they can technically be covered like allowing someone to make end of life decisions for you it costs money which opposite sex couples dont have to pay and contracts are frequently ignored by people like hospital staff who don't understand the law. When your partner is in the hospital suffering you shouldn't be stuck debating contract law with its staff and a single status, legal marriage, makes it crystal clear to all. While I do wish there was a code deprecation review committee in congress to eliminate things like financially favoring married couples at tax time practically speaking legally recognizing same sex marriage gets us much closer to equal treatment under the law much faster than debating each of those 1000+ rights individually. People in unrecognized same sex marriages are being actively harmed by their exclusion right now so IMO sitting around debating the perfect solution instead of moving forward pragmatically is harmful behavior.

[cturner]

OK, I'm convinced. But don't forget about that deprecation team.

[baconner]

Absolutely - this is why coders need to run for office more.

[x0x0]

On the off chance you're just uneducated and not a nasty little bigot playing dumb, the marriage right carries a ton of stuff besides a ring and a ceremony and any moral satisfaction the couple may get.

The right to see your spouse in the hospital, even (and particularly) if their family doesn't accept that their child is homosexual and attempts to ban a partner. (And this isn't a hypothetical; if you google you'll find just heart wrenching stories.)

It eases medical decisions when a gay spouse is badly injured or dying.

If there are children, both parents can have the right to care for them and make decisions for them.

The right not to testify against your spouse in some legal proceedings.

The right to get joint medical insurance.

Retirement benefits, which are particularly important when a higher income spouse passes first.

And more. See eg http://www.freedomtomarry.org/

edit: and a very important benefit: being treated as a first class citizen, ie one with the right to have your relationship recognized just like straight people have their relationships recognized.

[tzs]

> If you're in an alternative relationship and want to have a permanent union with someone else, or with several other people, you can go and draw up a contract and then get on with your lives. It could take as little as ten minutes. Contract law is fantastic like this.

A contract is only binding on the parties. Most of the marriage rights that gays want are significant because they apply to people NOT in the marriage.