IntelliJ also looks like shit. It has its own toolkit and the same horrible font rendering as any other swing program. If you want your IDE to be pretty, try Eclipse.
Not in the guise of Android Studio, using the Darcula skin. It is actually rather pleasant to look at, as far as IDE's go. Just make those humongous fonts a bit smaller and it looks quite sleek. I wonder why so many Java apps insist on using oversized fonts and features, especially since Swing was introduced?
Am i missing some magical eclipse configuration? I need to increase font sizes and at best i can only do half the IDE. Eclipse has been an atrocious experience for me so far.
Re antialiasing, if it's not looking right, try passing -J-Dswing.aatext=true -Dawt.useSystemAAFontSettings=lcd -J-Dorg.netbeans.editor.aa.extra.hints=true (on the command line or add it in $NETBEANS/etc/netbeans.conf)