[pastylegs]

It sounds like you are trying too hard to feel validated and you want immediate success. You have written a very long piece including your entire background, the success of your peers compared to yourself, the positions and awards you have gotten in various competitions (for better or worse). You sound entirely focused on accolades and achievements yet you have only been going at this for at most 1/2 years.

You need to calm down and slow down. You are only 22/23. You have so much time ahead of you and you have to walk before you can run. You have burned yourself out by too high expectations. It's not as easy as having an idea, hacking away at it for a few months and then reaping the reward.

I would suggest lowering your expectations over the short term and trying to come up with some realistic goals for the next few months. Not "launch great project in 6 months" but "talk to 5 people about the validity of feature X in the 7 days" etc.

You've already helped yourself by acknowledging the problem, writing about it and telling your family and friends.

[FLUX-YOU]

I'm in OP's shoes, except at 28. Nothing motivates me better than the thought of hitting 30. :)

[orting]

Dont worry, you dont actually feel it when you hit 30. But I get the feeling you are talking about.

I started programming relatively late, mid-twenties, and started as a CS student when I was 28. For the first two years I had this idea that I had to be faster and better than the younger students, to have a chance. But the world doesnt work that way. What matters is to try and figure out what you actually want to do, and then spend the time it takes to do it.

[NicoJuicy]

Same, i'm just 26 though ;)