[your_throwaway]

Enlighten me.

And while you're at it: why is okay for Louis CK to make a racist joke, but not okay for you?

If the joke is hurtful, then shouldn't you be against Louis CK telling it? Why are you okay with that? Why are you giving him support for doing something hurtful?

And I didn't say I wasn't capable of being sexist because my best friend is a woman. I said that if I treated a woman at a conference the same way that I treated my best friend, I would probably come across as a creepy asshole.

Similarly, if I treated some guy walking down the street the same way that I treat my best friend, I'd probably get labeled as a creepy asshole.

I've known my best friend for over a decade. I'm close enough with her to have a shorthand for jokes, or mannerisms, that doesn't exist with random people I've just met.

My point was that your post is using some extremely faulty reasoning.

No I'm 12: who cares? What does it matter how old I am? Maybe I am a woman! Then what?

Does what I'm saying depend on my age, or its content?

Do you apply the same logic when assigning validity to things that men and women say? The content doesn't matter, just the person saying it?

That's...dare I say it? Possibly pretty sexist of you.

[jfarmer]

> And while you're at it: why is okay for Louis CK to make a racist joke, but not okay for you?

Why it is ok for the jester to mock the king, but not for the king to mock the jester?

On a related note, Louis CK is Mexican, as in a Mexican citizen born in Mexico. Spanish is his first language and he came to the US as a little kid.

[Dewie]

He's also pretty much as white as they get. He has mostly European ancestry, little indigenous American ancestry.

The subject was race, not nationality.

[jfarmer]

We were talking about "racism" and "racist jokes." If you don't think the fact that Louis CK is Mexican but everyone thinks he's American plays into why and how his comedy works, we can agree to disagree. :)

[Dewie]

> If you don't think the fact that Louis CK is Mexican but everyone thinks he's American plays into why and how his comedy works, we can agree to disagree. :)

So how does his audience being ignorant of something, aid him in his comedy? How can it help him if people don't know of it?

Assume that they think he is a white American - then he looks like a typical white guy, making racist jokes (presumably, I've never seen them). The fact that he's really Mexican is not known to most people, so people will just think of him as a typical white American.

[melindajb]

Louis CK, to the best of my knowledge, is not considered a racist. I would not be the best judge of that as a white person, and when I am, I look to my black friends to tell me. I don't make them "explain" it to me. I just accept it. The know better than I do what makes something racist. And usually it's something I had never considered because of my white privilege.

The fault, is not in my logic, but your dogged insistence on reductionist thinking to the absurd. Most of the men around me know how not to be a creep, so I an assure it is possible to tell funny jokes, have beers with coworkers without harassment, and other such things. They will ask if they aren't certain, and they listen if I ask them to stop doing something.

That's what it's all about. Not reducing people to stereotypes. Giving respect immediately and willingly. At least until the other person demonstrates they aren't worth it.

So all this handwaving about not knowing how to behave in the world because the girls send mixed signals? Horseshit. my tribe of male friends, coworkers, mentors, advisors, and family is living proof that men do know how to behave honorably and respectfully in Silicon Valley, even Stanford trained engineers.

So instead of putting your questions at me, put them at yourself, why have you not yet learned what so many other successful men have learned?

[melindajb]

really, I eat downvotes for breakfast. so thanks!

[LockeWatts]

This isn't Reddit, stop whining.

[calibraxis]

I hope you also eat upvotes, because some of us appreciate your perspectives!