[WildUtah]

"just how many vowels do you have?"

Twenty to twenty-eight. Depends on the accent and dialect. Of course, it can be a different set of twenty-eight in different contexts, depending on accent and dialect.

"Is there really a difference between "backwards e" and "upside down v"?"

Not in Utah.

"English has much easier grammar than Spanish"

I don't really agree. English uses phrasal verbs instead of reflexives and circumlocution in place of most subjunctives, but they're just as complicated.