[codegeek]

"Networking is for people who don't know what they are doing and who don't have better ideas regarding what to do with their time and energy. "

Wait, what ? No. That's not what networking is for. You don't network only because you have nothing better to do and you are at the bottom of the food chain but because networking helps you create influence in a world where ultimately, everything comes down to human beings. Do you believe that successful people don't network anymore ? You are talking about "networking" as if it is a negative last resort kind of thing for losers. Not quite. I bet if you interview any successful person, they will tell you that people skills/networking is one of the most important aspects of success. Go read the book "how to win friends and influence people" to understand what networking is all about.

Networking is not a one time event. It is a continuous process regardless of whether you are rich or poor, success or failure

[nostrademons]

So when I was in college I was pretty shy, but I heard that networking was essential for career success, and so I was kinda terrified about what my future held.

It's 8 years later, I'm in my early 30s, and I feel like my network is doing pretty well. At least, some of my direct friends - people I would invite to crash on my couch when they're visiting town, or go out for dinner with weekly - are tech leads of major consumer products with millions of users, or entrepreneurs with a successful exit, or heads of university research departments, or responsible for managing tens of millions in investment portfolios. And my 2nd degree connections include early Google employees, venture capitalists, heads of government agencies, etc. This is all without doing all that much in the way of deliberate networking. I just get involved with things that I'm passionate about and seek out other people who are passionate about it - or, more commonly, get sought out by other people who are passionate about it.

It's a little paradoxical that almost all of my big career successes came from my network, but almost none of my network consists of people that I specifically "networked" with.

I think what a lot of people miss about general social interaction is that people like to hang out with other folks like themselves. If you specifically believe that networking is the key to success, you will attract other people that believe networking is the key to success, and you will end up with a network full of...well, networkers. Which can be great in fields like enterprise sales or politics where success is pretty much based on knowing lots of people who know lots of other people. But if you want to network with people who are passionate about changing the world for the better, your best bet is to be passionate about changing the world yourself, make your actions congruent with that, and you'll find that you will find and attract other such people.

[hbags]

"seek out other people who are passionate about it"

ding ding ding ding ding. This is what networking is. Purposefully interacting with people whose passions, and goals overlap your own.

It saddens me that so many tech folks do exactly what you did: writing a screed about how networking is useless, in which you explicitly note that you networked, and that your network is responsible for all of your big career successes.

[nostrademons]

It's also a little sad to see a bunch of people going to events they're not passionate about because they hear "networking is important". Unfortunately that happens a lot: people mistake effect ("I got involved in things that interested me, and met a lot of interesting people doing that") with cause ("I should go out and meet lots of people because then I'll be successful.")

[jblow]

I feel like a reasonably successful person at this point, and I don't do "networking". I am not uncommon in this regard; most of the most successful people people in my industry do not do "networking". That's why I posted my original comment; I feel it is a reality, among at least a very strong subculture of talented people, that is underrepresented in rhetoric.

Addressing some of the other replies: I have done certainly a lot of speaking engagements, and yes, these have been very helpful for becoming more known and whatever, but I never do them for that reason; I always do a speech because I have something specific that I really want to say. Any publicity is a by-product (and sometimes publicity is highly aggravating and undesired). I certainly don't try to meet people via speaking events, parties, dinners, whatever. Sometimes I do end up meeting people, but not that often really, and again, it is a by-product.

In my experience, successful people almost always go to a party just to go to a party and relax or see what's up. They aren't going to a party for ulterior motives like maybe meeting someone who they might be able to get something out of and blah blah blah. Actually, successful people often just don't go to parties because they have other things to do and parties where you don't have a strong peer group are not going to be very interesting.

If you have a specific business objective, you are not going to solve that by randomly going to an event and having random conversations. You are going to solve it by calling someone on the phone or emailing them. If you don't have a specific business objective, you probably won't find much traction with whatever you are doing unless you get a specific business objective.

[Double_Cast]

I think the lesson is that networking isn't a goal per se. Networking should be done with a purpose in mind; it should be a byproduct of getting stuff done. Networking for the sake of networking will get you nowhere fast.

[mikektung]

A lot of the commentary here is just shifting around the definition of networking--anywhere from attending public meetup events to "people skills".

The useful realization for an entrepreneur in a place like Silicon Valley is that networking is increasingly a commodity. The social graphs are so much more open and connected than before that anyone you'd want to meet is just one or two hops away. Thus, time and attention is better spent not on networking, but on the harder task of being a person of value to the network, so that other people will want to network with you.