[rb2k_]

I'll be moving from Germany to Boston in a month, one of the things that I'm looking forward to is the chance to enjoy this process of "being alone" and "Pushing back on discomfort".

As much as I enjoy the company of my friends, having complete freedom and no accountability to anybody also has its advantages :)

That being said, cities like SF/Boston/New York/... make it easy to keep "alone" from turning into "lonely". I couldn't imagine doing the same in the far out suburbs.

[lemonberry]

Do yourself a favor and visit Portsmouth, NH after you are acclimated to Boston or just need a reprieve from big city life. It's a smallish city with a great bar and restaurant scene. If you are into history there are also some wonderful opportunities to explore as well. Be warned, however, New Englander's can come off cold compared to people from other parts of the country. We make great friends but it takes awhile to get there.

[GrinningFool]

When I was living in NE, I was still 'the new kid from up the road' for five years ;)

I'd love to get back though, NE is my favorite among many places lived on the East coast.

[rb2k_]

I'm from Germany. As much as New Englanders hate to hear it, you guys are all warm and welcoming in comparison.

[replicatorblog]

Are you based in Portsmouth? I'm a fellow Granite State techie, always excited to hear of others!

[lemonberry]

I live in Wakefield but have worked in Portsmouth for a long time and spend most of my time there. Just breaking into the tech sector now. I'm a big fan of New Hampshire and New England in general.

[marcosdumay]

> I couldn't imagine doing the same in the far out suburbs.

Well, I don't know the US suburbs, but as a rule, the smaller the place, the easier it is to know people.

[VLM]

Its just mindless burb-bashing, doesn't mean a thing. I can assure you that a school campus in a big city isn't all that different than a school campus in a small city. Ditto museums, bars, concerts, whatever. They'll be some cultural offset what with the people being richer and the surroundings being somewhat more civilized, but its usually not a big deal.

The huge hang up is getting confused about geography. In a big city, nearly every street corner has a bar, restaurant, "something". So you get a hangup that what makes a city friendly somehow has something to do with street intersections or panhandlers or something, not the bar/museum/whatever found at those intersections. Then you visit a suburb and decide to socialize so you've learned that means finding a street intersection, so you stand at a random corner in your subdivision and ... nothing happens. That's because you need to go to a bar or park or cultural activity, not the mere street intersection.

Its confusing correlation with causation. I had fun; there's a homeless dude living in the alley; therefore you can't have fun without a homeless dude in the alley. Um no not really.

[rb2k_]

Nah, it's just that I've lived in suburbs and big cities. I enjoy tech meetups. Suburbs don't have them. It's just a numbers game of finding likeminded people. If your interest is a 1 in 1000 thing, you will find a few people in a city with a million inhabitants, with 5000 you probably won't

[rb2k_]

I don't want to get to know random people, I want to get to know a certain subset of people that share my interests.