| Honestly, it seems like you're being deliberately obtuse. Although you might think the author is being maximalist, you don't need to respond in kind. I realize you said you aren't and that you're being sincere, but it's hard to reconcile how those were the points you took from the article with a sincere desire to understand what the author wrote. In fact, to quote the author: "They bring nothing to the table except ... self-involved demands for “education”, endless derailing techniques paraded as “logic”, [and ] disingenuous bewilderment." I'll take you at your word, though. > I tried to work out what Shanley never, ever wanted to hear again, and I figure that it is the following 7 words....."I don’t know much about this, but" I think if there were one thing the author never wants to hear again, it's something like "There there, I know you're upset, but let me educate you on just how wrong you are." That conveys the quality of it, at least. > - do not try to defend the "white male establishment" which I apparently am part of. (I do not feel part of it, but I guess I get lumped in it until I prove I'm not part of it?) Personally, my main qualm with the phrase "white male establishment" is how cliché it is. Here are some lighthearted reflections on what the author was talking about, as I understand it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TG4f9zR5yzY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4LkrQCyIz8
http://bit.ly/JZJYMv
> - do not talk about my experiences with women in IT (they are probably outliers like Sheryl Sandberg and Marissa Mayer)No, her point was that Sandberg and Mayer are exceptions and shouldn't be used as a counterexample to statements like, "In technology it is more difficult for a woman to become a member of executive management than a man." This has the same flavor as folks arguing that racism in the United States is a thing of the past because we elected a black President. I'm sure the author would love folks to talk about the everyday experience of women in IT -- which is to say their experience, not your picture of their experience. > - be able to read vague complaints about general sexism with out thinking they're targeted at me Yeah, man up. Don't take it personally. Maybe instead of getting defensive, ask, "Have I ever done anything to make you feel like that or disempower you? Please let me know in private if I ever do or anyone else working here does. I don't want to make you feel that way, I don't want to implicitly model that behavior in front of other people, and I don't want other people to feel they have the license to do it." When feminists talk about "allies" they mean folks who both say and inhabit this sort of thing. |