[vertex-four]

And to drop out of the metaphor, and explain why it's broken:

I thought one of the big points of open-source was that if something exists, and it does what I want it to, I don't actually have to contribute (pay) anything further than what I want to. I still will, if it benefits me or if I'm interested, though.

As it turns out, there's a number of freely available distros maintained by others who see personal benefit in maintaining said distros, and some of those do have well-defined security and bugfix support infrastructure and teams. Therefore, those fill my needs, therefore, there is no logical reason for me to expend more effort than is necessary.