[_delirium]

I think this is fairly complex rather than a simple uniform transition, and interacts with culture in a way that varies a lot by region.

What the author seems to describe with dismay as being caused by smartphones has been pretty much normal in Scandinavia since long before smartphones. It's considered polite to pretend not to notice things like someone crying on a park bench, if they aren't someone you know. It's also (with some exceptions) considered weird and intrusive to strike up conversations with strangers, and instead you're supposed to be absorbed in your own thoughts, or book, or newspaper—or yes, nowadays, smartphone—unless you're out with friends or family you already know [1]. An exception is if you are at a bar and drunk. Of course, the norms are different in, say, Greece, and different again in Japan.

[1] One blogger refers to this as the Privacy In Public Act http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/how-to-piss-off-a-dane

[lobster_johnson]

> It's considered polite to pretend not to notice things like someone crying on a park bench, if they aren't someone you know

As a Scandinavian, I strongly disagree. It's not that it's considered polite, as such. It's just that Scandinavians are deeply inhibited by nature.

Someone crying on a park bench, or someone tripping and hurting themselves in the street, or a similar situation where a person needs help or shows signs of needing help, would simply be embarrassing. Most people would dearly want to help, but would hesitate to get involved because that means having to sort of open up socially and no longer be a neutral stranger.

The Scandinavian countries were, up to just a few decades ago, generally unmodern countries, sparsely populated and divided by physical distance and dominated by a sort of severe, patriarchical farming culture. Norway a little more so than the more centrally located Denmark and southern Sweden, I think. And this is something that is still imprinted on the mindset of later generations. This, by the way, is also why Scandinavians binge drink: To overcome their — our — social awkwardness.

Scandinavians, by the way, are terrified to death of initiating spontaneous connections with strangers, but they will open up right away if you approach them in an outgoing, friendly way.

[Dewie]

Nice caricature you've got going there. I like how sometimes people tend to shit on a people/group because they themselves are a part of because, hey, if they're a part of that same group they can supposedly say whatever they want without scrutiny since they have first-hand experience and they are 'only talking about themselves' (well, this is just an impression that I have since I don't know how to mind-read).

Yes, Scandinavians aren't ones to strike up conversations with strangers. Hell, they might be hesitant to respond positively to a stranger that is requesting their help. But I wouldn't say that they (we) are downright socially dysfunctional, as you seem to be saying.

[lobster_johnson]

When you have travelled a bit, you come to recognize that people do have interesting social behaviours that are intrinsic to the region and/or culture which are different from your own. The inhibition of Scandivians is easy enough to recognize, just as the British "stiff upper lip", which is very similar, is. It's not a caricature (did my description seem particularly grotesque or comical to you?), although it is obviously a generalization.

[Dewie]

> When you have travelled a bit, you come to recognize that people do have interesting social behaviours that are intrinsic to the region and/or culture which are different from your own.

What? Didn't I just say that yes, Scandinavians are not ones to strike up conversations? I merely pointed out that the Scandinavians being relatively reserved, while true, you're exaggerating it IMO.

And you don't know how much I have travelled. I have not been living in that neck of Europe all of my life (and I'm currently not).

[rdouble]

Even Scandinavian Americans act like this.

It's not politeness it's a culturally ingrained pathological aversion to interacting with strangers.

[abrowne]

Even non-Scandinavian Minnesotans act like this ;-)

[rdouble]

Good point. Although my friends from St. Paul with Irish backgrounds are significantly more outgoing and have much larger social circles.

[Dewie]

The average American is probably more outgoing than the average Scandinavian. So American culture is probably more outgoing. So being reserved and not "interfering" is more likely to be looked upon as a "pathology" than as "politeness" in this cultural context. In the same vain, an average American might be more likely to be looked upon as being "loud and obnoxious" than "open and friendly" by Scandinavians.

...and then we are back to the point that _delirium brought up about cultures varying by regions.