I hesitate to say this, but you may be a psychopath. Seriously. Most psychopaths are not mass murderers or monsters. You might want to talk to a mental health professional.
Just a quick note, "Psychopath" and "Sociopath" means the same. The difference is the term "Psychopath" has been abused by journalists, usually in the context of "psychopathic killer". The rise of the word "sociopath" is an attempt to start with a clean slate.