[alxp]

You might not realize it but the thing you're complaining about? That's the Patriarchy to a t. No one thinks 'patriarchy' means 'all men oppressing all women.' except people constructing straw men. Patriarchy is the force that both tells women they belong at home and tells men that it's honourable to die in war. It's all around us.

[makomk]

Not really. Patriarchy literally means "rule of the fathers", and the point being made when people talk about the patriarchy is exactly that all men are, fundamentally, more like the handful of men at the top than any women is - that men at all levels benefit from the power structures within society.

In fact, the reason it was called "patriarchy" in the first place was to draw an analogy between men who ruled entire nations and patriarchs who had no influence outside their own family - to treat them as though they shared in and benefitted from the exact same male-dominated power structures in the same ways, ignoring little details like some of them having far more downsides than benefits.

[hacker789]

I'm not constructing a straw man. You'll be bullied until you go silent if you claim to be a feminist while asserting that men can be victims of sexism, or that whites/Asians can be victims of racism[1].

You can use the word "Patriarchy". You can use the phrase "male domination". But it doesn't change the fact that men at the bottom have to watch the men at the top stomping all over them while preening themselves.

[1]: http://goatinahat.tumblr.com/post/45265637509/behaxrant-wesh...

[Crake]

Conservative fundamentalists bully me for being born the wrong way and having liberal views, and recently the liberals have all taken to bullying me as well whenever I post stuff about, well, male victims of sexism or white/asians being victimized by racism.

It's an incredibly cruel thing to do. For example, I saw my mother beating my father all the time when I was growing up, yet I get a bunch of straight liberals yelling at me if I mention supporting the establishment of domestic violence shelters for men about how they can't believe any "legitimate" GLBT person would support something like that. I once had a person tell me that she couldn't believe any self respecting GLBT person would support them, since "ANY study" would show that men were predominantly the agressors. I linked her to 200 studies showing equal rates of male vs female aggressors, and she made a vague post about cleaning her friendslist based on "politics" and promptly removed me. I don't know how to deal with people who literally refuse to acknowledge that my entire childhood is something that could never exist. Or refuse to recognize that they're wrong, when science says something that happens to contradict their pre established worldview.

It's incredibly bewildering, and more than a little cruel. I have to deal with the memories and trauma of my childhood, on top of conservatives AND liberals being unwilling to associate with me because of my views. That are mostly based on how and where I was born (GLBT, and understanding of how women assert their "female privilege" within our current society, which is matriarchal in many respects, based on observing my mother in action for 17 years).

Conservatives hate women and liberals hate men. What's an egalitarian to do? :(

I'm already severely marginalized, and liberals shunning me isn't exactly helping. I wish they'd stop enforcing mandatory privilege checks and actually just listen to the people they pretend to be advocating for, even just for once.

[hacker789]

Even if women were literally never aggressive against men, it's nonsensically cruel to use that as a reason against shelters for men.

"You don't deserve a safe space, John, because people with your genitals are the ones committing violence."

They have disturbingly collectivist notions of guilt.