[cwilson]

My girlfriend works for one of the bigger tech blogs. I can't count the number of times I've heard her rant about startups sending her 500+ word pitches where she still has no idea what they do or what they are trying to announce by the end of the email.

First rule of thumb: Say what you do and why you are pitching between the subject line and first (short) paragraph, in the most simple way possible. If you are worried you won't get a reply after that first paragraph you should likely rethink pitching at all.

Nail the first paragraph by keeping it simple (journalists REALLY appreciate this, meaning your entire email is more likely to be read), then provide any supplemental content in the following paragraphs.

Also, don't worry about getting every detail in the initial pitch. If the journalist is interested there will be plenty of time in the follow-up.