[mattchew]

> And what shall the gentleman do? "Well I love you but it's probably a mistake because I'm probably a mess myself so let's just walk away from it?"

It is OK to size up a potential relationship and make a practical decision about pursuing it before you actually fall in love with someone.

For most people, starting a relationship with a severe schizophrenic is a bad idea. You're letting yourself in for a lot of suffering and very likely you'll further injure your loved one when you eventually leave because you can't take it any more.

I think part of growing up is recognizing that not every person you feel attracted to is actually a good person for you to be involved with. Letting feelings of attraction trump one's better judgement causes a awful lot of misery in the world (usually in much less dramatic but much more common scenarios).

I'm speaking of the general case here. As you say, sometimes seemingly reckless relationships do work out. Kas clearly doesn't regret falling in love with Sally and I hope that they go on to have long and reasonably happy lives together.

[chernevik]

"It is OK to size up a potential relationship and make a practical decision"

Absolutely.

But that size up should consist of more than simple pattern recognition.