[Cthulhu_]

The internet has largely replaced / substituted this, which has been a mixed thing. Like minded people in smaller niches have been able to find each other online for example, much more than IRL, and much more at long range / internationally. It's made the world a smaller place, at the cost of knowing people closer to home.

[jimbokun]

It’s been a disaster.

It sounds good in principle. And I was very excited when discovering the Internet (Usenet) and a place to discuss all my geeky interests with many similar minded people.

However, now that the Internet has so overpowered in person relationships across the board, the cost in mental health, anxiety and general unhappiness is staggering.

[BeetleB]

It's not an all-or-nothing.

If you live in a society that really devalues everything you like, having that online outlet is the difference between giving up on life[1], and being passionate.

Imagine being told you're broken because you like books, movies, and video games, and having almost every aspect of society reinforce that message.

[1] Not in the suicide sense, but in the "Life will always suck" sense.

[jimbokun]

I was that kid.

Going to a university in a city helped a lot with that. Long conversations about comic books with friends, going to the nearby comics store on new release day with lots of other nerds, etc.

I’m no longer convinced adding the Internet to that has been a net positive. Maybe if we could have froze its growth and development at some specific point…?

[mckee_plus_plus]

Discord has done wonders for gaming shops keeping people connected and organizing in between weekly game sessions.

Meetup could be superceded by the hitch/tinder model to organize activities with individuals over scheduled events ran by organizers.

[BeetleB]

It helps before you get to university, and once you leave. The place you live for work may have very few people with similar interests.

[cucumber3732842]

>It’s been a disaster.

It wasn't a disaster until megaplatforms came alone.

[Gud]

Because back then the Internet was a hobby itself. Normal people(for a lack of better word) mostly weren't online.

[ryandrake]

You had to actually deliberately "go online." None of this always-on cable connection at home, let alone always-on wireless in your pocket. Nope, you had to deliberately decide "I'm going to go into the online world now." and then later "I'm going to go back to the real world." Much better IMO.

[SoftTalker]

It's always this way. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, et. al. killed the social internet, as Amazon and Walmart killed the mom-and-pop retailers, as Blockbuster killed the local video stores (but then Netflix killed Blockbuster).

[jimbokun]

Yes but that’s my point. Taken as a whole it’s been a net negative.

[xp84]

Agree. I think it might have been okay if the Internet had stayed in the naïve form it had circa 2003. In those days, I had a circle of friends on LiveJournal (the closer of which became AIM buddies as well) and I think we all derived huge positive benefits from having that in our lives.

The shift to the algorithmic "Feed" established adversarial incentives across the board - the platforms are incentivized to addict and enrage, the individuals are incentivized not to be vulnerable for friends, but to be viral and get approval of the public, since if your posts don't perform for strangers, the algorithm won't even show them to your closest friends.

The Internet gave us an easier way to make "friends" with no apparent downsides, only to rugpull us all as soon as most of the 'pre-Internet' places and social habits had been completely destroyed. Now we are all obviously lonely and hate the Internet mess, but whole generations are now too awkward to even speak to others in person, just from lack of experience.

[steveBK123]

I think its made relationships more short term and superficial.

We may recognize a handle on a forum, but most of the time we don't know anything about the other person other than a narrow part of their interests.

[foobarian]

I sometimes wonder if it was all worth it. What if we banned/rolled back the internet? Would we go back to more small-town-like community, and again have the nerd minority who "can't wait to get out of this place?" It feels like the current tech landscape is a reaction to that environment.

[jimbokun]

I would.

And I’m the nerd minority who “couldn’t wait to get out of this place.”

Now, I would still go to a big city where I could find people with similar interests. But the cost to society of all the Internet has wrought has been far too high.