[rubylimetea]

Is ghosting really such a big deal?

Wait until you get an overly smug rejection letter that the author seemed too eager to write, and took too much joy in writing.

Some people love to reject, and would never miss an opportunity.

Another angle is -

If you've been ghosted, you still have not been told no. That means there's no record of you ever getting denied for the position.

(and maybe you really haven't been)

It's kinda better IMO

[neilv]

> Wait until you get an overly smug rejection letter that the author seemed too eager to write, and took too much joy in writing.

I got one of those a few years ago, from a prominent tech startup CEO (non-YC).

The funniest thing is that I'm pretty sure it's a person who has some kind of recurring episodes of anonymously attacking HN infrastructure and dang.

Who then also attacked me on HN (and elsewhere, it looks like), while seeming to reference that earlier rejection, and emphasizing how much they thought I was unworthy.

> That means there's no record of you ever getting denied for the position.

Or record held in the mind, even years later, of someone who sometimes acts out maliciously.

Apparently, it's a real thing.

[rubyfruit]

This comment is so specific I know what you’re talking about and that you’re wrong about at least 2 details.

Whether you made it up or are confusing multiple people idk

Dang isn’t a great person, no mod is. Censorship is evil and we’re still in the dark ages.

In the future they will say in 2026 people were something like illiterate - nobody cared about solving death or aging (nobody is even working on it) and the authority of our day was way more into censoring ideas and collecting rent.

You’re basically a Savonarola fanboy

[rubyfruit]

Not lost on me that you had your name scrubbed from comments, the "offending" account banned, all under the guise of "harassment", and then you come back and solicit more trouble - as if you can't get enough.

Hahah.

I forgot you existed, Neil. And don't be too hard on yourself - job market is cooked. The time to build your legacy is now.

[cableshaft]

You could be waiting to hear back from one company before telling another company that may have extended an offer yes or no, and it can take a while before you determine if you're ghosted or if they're just busy and haven't made a decision yet.

[SoftTalker]

An offer extended is better than an offer you're just hoping might come. Act on what's real.

[tayo42]

Just send a follow up email after a few days asking for a timeline.

[cableshaft]

I have done exactly that before with a company, but they hadn't ghosted me.

But this is about them ghosting you. So presumably even if you ask them this they don't get back to you, otherwise they're not ghosting you.

[dofm]

This is to some extent a generational thing, but yes. It’s rude. If you’re not ready to politely reject numerous candidates, don’t interview them.

If you get a shitty rejection letter, you should see it as a lucky escape. A rejection burns both your bridge and theirs.

If it’s especially shitty, there is nothing stopping you publishing it as a signal to others that a recruiter or employer is wasting people's time.

Especially if you just did a coding exercise that looks suspiciously like code they might put a value on.

[bitwize]

And this is why ghosting is a thing.

We've entered into an era when self-defense is more important than outdated notions of politesse. In dating, for instance, it's usually advantageous for a woman to ignore (ghost) a man she wants nothing to do with rather than reject him, to avoid the argument or retaliation that may come with explicit rejection. Too many bad actors have changed the strategy. If you can't handle ghosting, maybe you don't belong in the job or dating markets.

[dofm]

Dating is different. It's IMO fully inappropriate to draw that comparison.

Professionals act professionally. Ghosting is profoundly unprofessional. It is their job to manage the process with full information. End of story.

> If you can't handle ghosting, maybe you don't belong in the job or dating markets.

Ehhh? This is a very weird, I think silly, perhaps even insulting thing to say. I can handle it. I just think it's rude and unprofessional from a potential employer — someone that I have wasted my time and perhaps might have actually risked my job security to interview with.

Not every employer reacts well when they find out you're out there going to interviews, and they do find out.

As a freelancer, if I go to an interview it is my time they are wasting if they aren't going to handle the process professionally.

[SoftTalker]

How have they wasted less of your time if they write you a letter vs. ghost you? Either way, you spent time preparing for and following their application/interviewing process. I agree ghosting is unprofessional but it doesn't really cost you anything.

One of your last questions in any interview should be "when should I expect to hear your decision" and if you've heard nothing by then, take it as a "no."

[rubylimetea]

> Too many bad actors have changed the strategy.

1a) Who the other girl is looking at

1b) Wallet Size

2) Face And Body Appearance & Social Positioning

3) Dick Size

That's it playboy

[rubyfruit]

> there is nothing stopping you publishing it as a signal to others

Well, online moderation can stop you.

Glassdoor seems more about keeping things "squeaky clean" rather than "transparency" ;)

I don't think candidates (or customers for that matter) have much of a voice anymore online.

Everyone who's popular on social media who could reach huge audiences is already working for the brands.

[okasaki]

Yeah, I don't get it. I think nothing is about the same as getting a generic "unfortunately" email.

And I actually prefer nothing to unsolicited feedback. I don't give a shit about what someone who can't even spell principal thinks about me.