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by throw310822
11 days ago
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> All those are real effects on women and if they trust you a little, they openly talk about them. I know plenty of mothers who have a better social life than mine. It's not like mothers are this rare and little known phenomenon. Of course everyone will happily talk about the upsides and downsides (and often more of the downsides) of their lives and choices, that's not the sign of some fundamental difficulty. > I did not said THEY are bad. Sorry, I didn't mean this. I mean that you don't seem to be able to mention anything desirable or even enviable in the condition of being a mother: only isolation, helplessness, toil and, as a positive quality, self-sacrifice. I'm not blaming mothers, I'm trying to make you aware that you haven't attributed anything desirable to motherhood, and this feels like a great illustration of the effect the original post is about. If the only things we think a woman achieved by becoming a mother are dependence, a boring life and social isolation, then it's not very surprising at all that fertility rate is plummeting. Actually, the only reason you manage to come up with for a woman to have children is "fertility is going down"- which is an abstract, societal one. And who cares? Why would it be any individual's problem, why should a woman sacrifice herself because "fertility is going down"? |
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I described how experience of motherhood was and its real impact on people. I did experienced some of that, I heard real life women talk about these and I have seen sociological studies confirming the same. For example, being stay at home mom is one risk factor for alcoholism. Social isolation is super common.
I described it only because you kept trying to frame the above issues as "status seeking", being the coolest or in grand dreams I just cant relate to. But that is not what women decide on when they decide between having a child or having another child. These down to earth basic impacts are the reason to say "nope, not another one".