If you consider the extras built into noctalia: notifications, screen lock (i think), wallpaper daemon .... daemons you have to install/configure piecemeal, noctalia is already in the ballpark of a waybar-based setup.
Haha, dude, the stuff we used to do when we were young. Transparent conky on the desktop showing a bunch of graphs that drive their own selves up. Spinning cubes to get workspaces. Loved it. And ran it on absolutely garbage hardware too.
It will always be uncool to do this stuff, and I will always be there for it.