[john_strinlai]

>it’s buried in the tags as grey on light grey on white.

if you happened to miss the tags, reading approximately any of the article should make it pretty clear.

"This report was reviewed by Legal, who have asked us to clarify that the fox was depicted as over eighteen and that the sunglasses remained on throughout."

[piskov]

Quoting literally the last paragraph is not helping to promote this as obviously satire

[john_strinlai]

it was just my favorite part. i can copy/paste all of the outlandish parts, if you want, but i would be copy/pasting the entire article.

ignoring the satire tag at the top of the page, some examples from the first ~20%:

    - its on a personal blog, with no mention of what the actual product is
    - resolving an incident "by treaty"
    - "Severity: Informational → Critical → Withdrawn → Critical → Negotiated"
    - incident *duration* measured in "billable tokens"
    - link to a CVE named "YIKES"
    - an incident being resolved by the attacker reading a file
    - no dates provided, just "Day 1, 02:51 UTC"
    - creats.io doesn't exist

and so on, and so on, and so on