[hilariously]

Yep, I actually want to know the system has some sort of baseline performance that only hockey sticks under conditions I can monitor and control... but also the business wants to try new feature X and vendor is promising new performance for feature Y, and new patches are coming in affecting ???.

[fragmede]

And oh, you just have to set this one setting that you need to pay a consultant to know all the settings in order to tweak and tune the database for your use case. Still the TPC competitions such that oracle won because they managed to hand two assembly from five instructions down to four as an impressive bit of computer engineering nerditry.