[KolmogorovComp]

I’m reasonably skilled talking to strangers (can last about 3-4 hours in planes/trains/buses if the other party is up to it, after that I usually dry out of conversation), and do that frequently.

However after several years of heavy traveling and hundreds of people talked to, you realize how similar everyone is. It is always the same issues, wife/husband, the kids, the parents…

And it all starts to become a bit superficial. Sure, you can talk, but to what avail? You realize how shallow the situation is because the common ingredient in all stories is that everyone only ever care about their closed ones, which you and them will never be.

And you reassess the book option whose insight or knowledge may very well impact your life much more than yet another seconds to hours long chitchat.

Signed: a disillusioned extrovert.

[antinomicus]

That’s sad man - I also talk a lot to strangers and yeah most of the time you get average people, but then you meet that one in a million person and learn something truly fascinating or expand your sphere of knowledge or emotion or art or whatever. I’m always on the lookout for the next brilliant engineer, sensitive artist, or just a well read janitor.

[rTX5CMRXIfFG]

Wouldn’t you consult a book or a video and practice a skill if you really wanted to expand your knowledge? And a “well-read janitor”, while certainly possible, is a trope more often seen in works of fiction. And what does “expanding your emotion or art” even mean?

[dredmorbius]

Conversation tends to be a less-curated alternative. You're going to read something you've elected to read, and have expectations of, whether that's a topic of interest, favourite author, recommendation by an acquaintance, current best-seller or well-reviewed work, something hunted down through references or footnotes, etc.

The people you encounter daily may well also represent selection biases, but they're probably going to be at the very least along a different axis, and you might be surprised at what comes up. I like to have a balance of intentional and serendipitous feeds in my life, whether technically-mediated or organic. Keeps things interested.

Having the book or a podcast on tap as needed isn't a bad backup. But talking, even briefly, to strangers may prove provocative.

[antinomicus]

It means expanding your empathy. If you don’t do art, I highly recommend it. I talk to random people and learn more about the human condition and incorporate it into my songwriting.

[wiether]

  > And it all starts to become a bit superficial.

I'll never confide in a stranger, so if they want to talk, I'll try to bore them out with superficial stuff.

Signed: an introvert.

[KolmogorovComp]

So you’re wasting both your time and theirs, for no reasons. Instead, try politely signaling you’re not interested.

That being said, fortunately it’s easy to see people who like to talk.

[wiether]

I'm having fun doing that to be honest.

But to get back to the topic: that's why I'm wearing AirPods in public now; signaling that I'm not interested.