[cmrdporcupine]

The "deep meaning" of taking care of a young child for me is only this: putting yourself at the service of another and being needed.

One specific challenge of raising adolescents is I think precisely running into that place where they start to hit the life confusions you're speaking of, and it's in many cases like holding up a mirror to your own pains from adolescence. But this time without any agency, you're a spectator.

When they're little and they're reaching for a hot surface you can raise alarm and grab their hand and pull it away.

But you lose the ability to substantially "make" a young adult do anything. You can't stop them from skipping school. From spending all their time on their phone. From smoking weed or wasting their time on video games. Or much worse, harming themselves in any number of scary permanent ways.

You can't pull their hand away from the fire. They have the autonomy to make mistakes and something about that age... some just seem to revel in it?

[markus_zhang]

I agree that bringing up a kid is like holding a mirror to oneself. For every day I see my shortcomings enlarged. Alas there are not many good things in my genes to begin with anyway.

Not sure about the teenagers as my kid is too young. But I do remember I was like what you described when I was a teenager -- I didn't do drugs or any illegal stuffs, but maybe being totally confused and squandered the whole 15 or so years between 20 and 35 are not really too different.

Anyway, glad that you found a lot of meaning in parenting. I'll still need to search for mine.