[wouldbecouldbe]

In most places there are software meetups, in my area there are many at meetup.com. I once started one myself, that later got taken over and is still quite big. Actually a lot of fun, and at the time we would even get sponsoring offers quite quickly.

[jdw64]

I don't have that kind of gathering on side. There are no programming meetups. It's an industrial area. My job mostly involves programming equipment operation using WinForm and WPF. I sometimes wish there were such meetups too. Around here, it's all factories

[embedding-shape]

Create your own low-stakes "Beer & Programming" or whatever is doable where you live.

I grew up on a island where there was maybe one or two other people who knew computers enough to know programming as a thing existed as a concept, but similarly to you, absolutely nothing else, and it gets very lonely and outright boring after a while.

I solved this (accidentally) by moving to another area, but isn't possible for everyone, then the closest you can get to that would be to bring people closer to where you are instead, or start up something small and reoccurring :)

[jdw64]

Thank you for your advice.

[wouldbecouldbe]

yeah you can just start your own! meetup (and if you have fb groups) have a good chance to bring in lots of people.

[bluebarbet]

Tangentially, over the last decade or two Meetup.com has allowed me to meet countless people in multiple countries, of whom some became friends. I've got such value out of this commercial service that I frequently find myself worrying about its business model. To me, Meetup is close to being the holy grail: an independent company, an excellent web client with no need to install an app, and it's not integrated with the corporate social platforms. I so want them to continue to prosper.

[ChrisMarshallNY]

We have them around here.

I stopped going, because the “circle of avoidance” around me makes me self-conscious.

The ageism in New York, is even worse than in Silicon Valley.

[gorjusborg]

What do you mean by circle of avoidance?

[ChrisMarshallNY]

When I go to these gigs, I tend to be the oldest person there.

No one makes eye contact, and no one looks at me. I find it extremely difficult to start conversations, and I'm a fairly gregarious chap. There's usually a space around me, about a meter wide; even when it's crowded.

The good news is, I rarely have trouble finding a seat.

[gorjusborg]

I'm sorry you have had to experience that.

As much as I'd like to judge, I had a little bit of that 'elder avoidance' in my 20s, and I look back and cringe at how stupid I was.

I'm old enough now to know that 'my people' can't be determined by things I can judge easily by looks or short interactions. I'm going to hope they get it at some point.