[vitally3643]

> This used to be the job of our friends, families, and coworkers: To push us harder. I think we are losing something.

No, and if you think that, your friends, family, and coworkers probably don't like you that much. You can push yourself harder for someone else, but it is and has always been something you do. Making it everyone else's problem to improve you makes you a codependent asshole. You can and should find purpose and meaning, even motivation and inspiration in others. It is not anyone's "job" to make you a better person.

That's precisely the kind of thinking that's landed us in the mess we're in. Abdication of personal responsibility. Shifting blame and responsibility from yourself onto anyone nearby. It is your job to make yourself a better person for the people around you. Not the other way around.

[inanutshellus]

I interpreted GP's message as "We used to lean-on and learn-from our friends, families, and coworkers, and insodoing we ourselves improved in a symbiotic way".

The "job" in the speech example would be "hey Joe, can I run this speech by you?"

In that scenario, the friend would:

  * feel valued, 
  * connect with you, 
  * have something to do socially instead of "sooo uh whatcha been up to... uh... nice weather...", and
  * get to hone their own speech skills by critiquing in a safe environment.

And.. yeah... it is the "job" of a friend/coworker to say "yes" to that question, right?

[cstever]

Ok; That's good feedback. Job may not have been the right word. I admit I didn't pass my comment through an LLM, so thank you for helping me improve and push harder. ;)

[inanutshellus]

Or maybe use a friend! "Hey joe, please proofread literally everything I post on the internet! It's your job after all!" ;-)

[cstever]

It's not about making them be responsible for me or offloading my problems or them making me better.

It's about community. And real people often like to help. If your circle doesn't, find someone who does. Find a community.

I enjoy helping people be better, to reach new heights in their personal lives. It's about relationships.

My thoughts aren't about "abdication of personal responsibility" or "Shifting blame".

It's about humanity and people and community.

[Arainach]

There's no abdication of personal responsibility. To be the kind of person who wants to constantly improve, it is incredibly important to surround yourself with similar people.

You will always grow faster spending time with someone who says "couldn't you also try X" than someone who always says "that's good enough, why don't you relax and watch some TV".

[itsalwaysgood]

This is good stuff. At the end of the day, we all have finite time. How we choose to spend that time is a personal matter.

Some say we're losing our humanity: that can be seen as good or bad, depending on whether or not you think you are more useful than someone else.