[DANmode]

> The abuse is definitely NOT the victim's fault, it's 100% the fault of the abuser.

At some stage, (regardless of law or what’s right), standing in a pedestrian-crossing on a busy thoroughfare is foolish.

Keep hanging out in the crosswalk hoping Bezos will stop for you,

if you want,

but don’t chastise those warning others to move.

[rmunn]

Did you see the P.S. I edited in? I'm not taking objection to "hey, you should move" (or "hey, you probably shouldn't park there if you don't want your car windows smahsed"). It's the specific "it's your fault" phrasing I'm objecting to. It would have been better phrased as "remember, everything that happens afterwards is something you could have avoided". The line can be fuzzy sometimes, and I've definitely seen people throwing around accusations of victim-blaming where such accusations are unwarranted (someone saying "hey, if you're a woman, you'd be wise not to hang out in such-and-such a neighborhood alone after dark" is definitely trying to give advice, not victim-blame, but I've seen something phrased in nearly exactly those terms — I don't recall them verbatim — get unfairly accused of victim-blaming). So I agree with you in many cases. This specific one, though, was phrased as "it's your fault" and I can't agree with that phrasing. It's still the abuser's fault, even if the victim didn't take action to get out of the situation.

But yes, people in abusive relationships (whether in their personal or professional lives) should be advised to get out of there, and should be helped to do so as best as you can. No qualms with that.