[adithyassekhar]

You know there’s an upcoming generation of developers who are so jealous of you? Not your fault or anything.

We managed to make the latter irrelevant or by no means a high earner.

Everything is expensive, tech took over all the jobs, now tech itself has found ways to end those jobs. You either have to be a medical professional/media person now to live without worry.

[engineer_22]

> You either have to be a medical professional/media person now to live without worry.

No, you just need to live within your means.

The internet is amazing, I like to watch videos from developing nations, where people live on a fraction of western budgets... what strikes me is the happy, free people I see. That's hard to fake.

[adithyassekhar]

What you see is the happy side of things, of a particular section of society, packaged in a way to make the viewers feel good and not sad. They’re either too poor and uneducated or too rich.

Most of us, educated, are aware of the fact that we are one medical emergency away from being bankrupt.

> No, you just need to live within your means.

I politely disagree. Means for me personally includes not worrying about healthcare, losing a job, unexpected expenses, affording the facilities to participate in society rather than becoming a travelling nomad. It’s easy to be blind to your own blessings, even more so if you have already lived a life. These are life goals for people of my generation in my country.

People, educated ones, are no longer marrying. Guess why?

[engineer_22]

> What you see is [...] packaged in a way to make the viewers feel good and not sad.

Maybe. Or maybe they are genuinely young, free, and happy.

> Most of us, educated, are aware of the fact that we are one medical emergency away from being bankrupt.

Yes, but being aware of your mortality is inextricably linked to the human experience. Not a bug, a feature.

> Means for me personally includes not worrying about healthcare, losing a job, unexpected expenses, affording the facilities to participate in society rather than becoming a travelling nomad.

My friend, I do not know your circumstances so I venture carefully. Your reply seems to be focused on risk, rather than what a person can control by their own behavior. Risk is a part of life - we all have different tolerance of risk. What I mean by "live within your means" is to spend less than you earn. I understand the difficulties, but it is not impossible. I have been in poverty in my life, and I feel fortunate that we were able to escape it.

> People, educated ones, are no longer marrying. Guess why?

I have my own theories, but I'd be happy to know yours

[adithyassekhar]

> What I mean by "live within your means" is to spend less than you earn.

I see where you are coming from, I genuinely take it in good faith. There's just this constant pressure to be this or that at certain stages of our lives, especially in the asian culture I am part of. I've managed to avoid these all my life but lately I've been falling for it as well.

> I have been in poverty in my life, and I feel fortunate that we were able to escape it.

Genuinely happy to hear this. :) It gives a lot of hope.

> I have my own theories, but I'd be happy to know yours

It's a cultural thing, I have friends who haven't married yet because they feel they can't afford a family with their current circumstances. Here marriages are a family thing, so the parents need to approve. And no father or mother will send their daughter to such a person when they have more options available to them. You could live the frugal life or the glamorous instagram life people are brainwashed with. Everyone is running in a constant state of survive or die mentality because no one has a safety net to fall back to.

I am not saying all are like that, there are independent strong women/men but they are dime a dozen.

[engineer_22]

What you described, it reminds me of what I saw on TV when I was a little boy, lemmings marching to the sea. I see similarities with young people in USA.

We are smarter than lemmings, we can see the danger, but we're also smart enough to convince ourselves that our eyes betray us there is no danger.

Marching forward while calling back for those behind to carry a rope, this is still the same madness, isn't it?

[cloverich]

> but being aware of your mortality is inextricably linked to the human experience.

They aren't aware / afraid of their mortality. They are aware of the lack of financial safety net / social support. It is in effect everyone accepting a more primal state of affairs, where the weak die, as a virtue. Rather than a state of affairs that we are economically capable of: Universal healthcare. Many of us understand this is a political hurdle. But that is precisely what makes it so disheartening. If we were all too poor to afford socialized healthcare, we could at least take solace in our shared experience. But that is not the state of affairs. It is an invented problem. And most frustrating of all, we already spend more than people with universal healthcare. Maddening.

[engineer_22]

How much money is your life worth?

How much is the government willing to spend to keep it?

How much are you willing to spend?

What is healthcare, and how to distinguish that from simply prolonging the inevitable?

And what of those who refuse to eat well and exercise?

What of those who smoke, drink, and debauch themselves? Or ride motorcycles and jump from high places?

How do we prioritize our doctors' already strained schedules?

Unfortunately, from my perspective, universal healthcare sounds like it may require more draconian calculus than the imperfect system we now enjoy.

Do I empathize with my neighbor who struggles with the load? Of course I do!

But should I want to take his place when I've carried a burden of my own?

[engineer_22]

> You are looking at this from the wrong angle.

Thank you, I'm confident I will fairly consider all which you're about to reveal!

> We get taxed a lot (not if you are ultrawealthy but still…). so government is taking [sic] of money in exchange for…? well in the USA it is in exchange for paying down debt and department of “defense” so that we can bomb the [sic] out of everyone we want whenever we want.

An idea so crucial to the birth of this nation, is that taxes are not paid in any "exchange". Your property is removed from you and your government makes use of it as it will. In fact, the federal income tax was unknown to our country before it was concocted to raise funds for WW1 and was unfortunately never retired. Pointing out our current conflicts is definitely appropriate!

> we also spend [sic] of money on healthcare already but this money is going you know where, middlemen and racking in profits and doing a whole lot of other things except providing care. so the question is - where would you rather your tax dollars be spent?

I would rather my government didn't help itself to my money at all. In my opinion concentrating the wealth of a nation in the hands of a few is exactly the circumstances most certain to create the corruption I think you've described.

> and also another question which is why are Americans the only citizens of any developed nation where providing care is “impossible

In the United States emergency care must be provided, regardless of ability to pay.

For non-emergency care, please consider some of the issues I've already raised.

[bdangubic]

You are looking at this from the wrong angle. We get taxed a lot (not if you are ultrawealthy but still…). so government is taking shitton of money in exchange for…? well in the USA it is in exchange for paying down debt and department of “defense” so that we can bomb the shit out of everyone we want whenever we want. we also spend shitton of money on healthcare already but this money is going you know where, middlemen and racking in profits and doing a whole lot of other things except providing care. so the question is - where would you rather your tax dollars be spent? and also another question which is why are Americans the only citizens of any developed nation where providing care is “impossible”?

[anticorporate]

> You know there’s an upcoming generation of developers who are so jealous of you? Not your fault or anything.

I do, and and I think that's part of the reason I feel guilty about not working. Why should I get an easy ride when other people did not? I suppose there's some small element of worrying that I'm wrong about my future needs . I know I have some skills that are still useful and I can put them to work now, but I'm less sure I'd be able to do that in five years. That part of it is probably not maladaptive, however, even though it probably comes from the same place of growing up with very little.

[bluefirebrand]

> I do, and and I think that's part of the reason I feel guilty about not working. Why should I get an easy ride when other people did not?

Devils Advocate: Why don't you feel guilty for continuing to work, continuing to absorb a salary that doesn't really matter for you but could be life changing for someone else who is looking for their chance?

Just a slightly different perspective

[anticorporate]

That's certainly a consideration. The story I tell myself is that brought a skill set to the job that the organization I work for otherwise couldn't afford and took a salary well below the market rate for the position. It's a worker-owned cooperative retailer with a relatively flat pay scale that doesn't differentiate between types of roles, only levels, so I'm on the same pay ladder as our cashiers and dishwashers. I am, though, perhaps taking a job from someone else who wanted to pivot their career. There are no perfect answers.

[jimbokun]

Sounds like you’re living the FIRE dream.

[jimbokun]

Working a paid job does nothing to help those less fortunate than you. Maybe by retiring early you can free up time to help others in more creative ways?

[insom]

I'm in the same situation as GP and while I think you're right (we're some of the last well paid software developers who aren't also founders) it doesn't help with feeling less guilty!

It's a weird kind of guilt because it's not like we individually created these economic conditions; we were just there at the right time to take advantage of them before they were gone. I tend to think of this as "useless guilt" (vs. guilt about taking a transatlantic flight or other high-impact activity -- which I still do, but I think that guilt is societally useful)

[alphawhisky]

> You either have to be a medical professional/media person now to live without worry.

Civil Engineer here. Used to get clowned on by other STEM students for going into one of the "lowest paying" engineering majors. Post grad, I can't imagine a more stable job, and my generational cohort is having a hard time. Boy do I feel smart. And the bonuses after construction season? Forget about it.

[wing-_-nuts]

I would think the biggest reward in civil engineering is seeing some tangible piece of infrastructure you designed, built, and serving society. Software engineering has been an interesting career, but I die a little inside when software I've written gets blown away like a Tibetan sand painting.

[jimbokun]

Well played.

Atoms >> Bytes.

[adithyassekhar]

Ah yes, forgot about Civil/Mechanical/Electrical. These I believe are foundational disciplines.

[stronglikedan]

> You either have to be a medical professional

not even any longer, unfortunately