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by quag 72 days ago
It reminds me of around 2002 when Microsoft named everything ".net".
9 comments

Yep, I remember downloading a beta version of what would be eventually released as Windows Server 2003. The beta version was called Windows .Net Server 2003.
I had some books that referred to it as .NET Server printed before the name change. In the long history of terrible Microsoft names, this was a rare case where they were able to right the ship.
"Microsoft Surface" ...

If had first meant a coffee table form factor PC with touch screen and special software, which was able to sense special objects placed on top of it. Then that was renamed to "PixelSense" [1] and "Surface" instead got put on a line of touchscreen tablet form factor PCs launched together with Windows 8. OK, reusing a strong name for a product line expected to sell more, and which still fit the theme made sense.

.. but then the brand was also put on laptops, convertibles, desktop PC and an Android phone ... eh, OK, but at least those also had touch screens.

... but then the brand was also put on generic peripherals: keyboard, mouse, headphones, earbuds, etc. which diluted the brand to mean practically nothing. For example, a search for "surface keyboard", could result in a "type cover" for some kind of tablet PC or a keyboard intended for desktop computers.

Microsoft later did the same with the "Microsoft Sculpt" brand. It was first a compact curved "sculpted" ergonomic keyboard with chiclet keys and an ergonomic mouse that were most often sold as a set. That got quite popular and so the brand achieved recognition. But later, Microsoft decided to reuse that brand for completely generic peripherals with no special ergonomic designs whatsoever.

BTW. Not long after, Microsoft also released products with the similarly ungoogleable names "Microsoft Bluetooth Keyboard" and "Microsoft Ergonomic Keyboard".

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microsoft_PixelSense

> a search for "surface keyboard", could result in a "type cover" for some kind of tablet PC or a keyboard intended for desktop computers.

Do you mean blades?

Proof that I'm not hallucinating that name: https://www.windowscentral.com/meet-surface-music-kit-new-bl...

Oh, Blades, like the Xbox 360 Dashboard thing?

Or no, you must be referring to the Azure Portal sections.

And “one” like most Fortune 500 companies.
The first one I remember is RealPlayer. I think the official story was that they were having more and more trouble convincing people to install upgrades (at a time when 56k and slower modems were still common, dowloading an app could take minutes, ugrade nags seemed to be ever present), so they decide to name the new major version RealOne Player "because it's the One, the only One you need, the One that does everything for you".

Of course, this meant that the next time they tried to get anybody to install a patch, some of us felt annoyed because. RealOne Player wasn't "the One" after all. Why should we get back on the treadmill of waiting for downloads that rarely seem necessary?

Ahem. I think this event sensitised me against all attempts at using "one" like that. I mentally flip a table every time.

one.copilot.net
Then they did the same thing to a lesser degree with "360", including the Xbox.
Also Live. Windows Live [whatever], Xbox Live [whatever], Games for Windows - Live, Office Live.
Also 365 -_-
The joke is "expect one day of downtime every leap year", but in practice it seems a bit more than that.
Or when IBM renamed everything Websphere.
> Or when IBM renamed everything Websphere.

You mean "Web's fear"? ;-)

And then Watson
Soon: Copilot .NET .
Azure PowerCopilot Live .NET
... 360 (+5)
Which was arguably more problematic. Are you referring to a web address or a Microsoft product?
More importantly, you couldn't usefully search for it with the search engines of the time.
I wonder how many human lifetimes of effort have been wasted due to poor naming decisions by Microsoft.
None of us had any idea what updates were supposed to be back then and yet those updates were probably less broken than they are now
Being a (very) young script kiddie I was so confused it had nothing to do with the TLD. None of the sites were even hosted on a .net domain! "Wtf?"