[nh23423fefe]

    <input.json  jq -S  -r '(first | keys) , (.[]| [.[]]) | @tsv'
    <input.json  # redir
    jq
    -S           # sort
    -r           # raw string out
    '
    (first | keys) # header
    ,              # comma is generator
    (.[] |           # loop input array and bind to .
    [                # construct array
     .[]             # with items being the array of values of the bound object
     ])           
     | @tsv'        # generator binds the above array to . and renders to tsv

[randusername]

oh my god how could I have been doing this for so long and not realize that you can redirect before your binary.

I knew cat was an anti-pattern, but I always thought it was so unreadable to redirect at the end

[attentive]

it seems smart until you accidently type >input.json and nuke the file

[HappMacDonald]

That sounds like a mistake which would be easily to make at the end of the line, unless you are contrasting input stream redirect against cat regardless where it's written on the line?

[figmert]

You can use sponge for that.