[throwawaysleep]

Depends? Are those more narrow one’s better and people have a better idea of what ideal looks like?

I’m kind of horrified at people saying they had/have to work at their best friendships as with my best friends, everything is seamless.

There are no misunderstandings. We never have to forgive each other. We never even need to clarify things for each other much, as we are that well aligned.

Granted it may not be possible, but ideally go find a better match in a friend.

[MarkusQ]

The axes are independent. You can have seamless friendships with people who are very different from you, and contentious relationships with folks who are just like you (but doing it wrong!)

There's nothing wrong with having to work at friendship. For years I had a friend that I looked up to (and, as it turned out looked up to me). We were both constantly striving to justify the other's faith and respect. It was a lot of work but incredibly valuable for both of us.