[conductr]

I went through it with my wife too and expecting a 19 y/o women to go through the IVF process as an insurance policy is a bit insane to me. In our modern, western society, this is age is still solidly childhood with not much definitive thoughts of future family, marriage, etc.

Governments need to make COL more affordable, birth rate will go up naturally

[greygoo222]

Calling 19 "childhood" is crazy. Most teens have an understanding of what they want their life to look like.

[conductr]

It is crazy but it’s also quite true. People eschew true adult responsibility for much longer these days. It’s a macro trend.

I know there’s a lot of “whys” but not getting married, not having kids, living with parents, etc all compound to remaining a child in some sense and this is continuing well into the 20s and even 30s for a large portion of the demographic.

When it comes to 19 y/o women the fact most internet people would find it gross that 1) highly fertile and 2) desired by old men - is a reality. We tell old men these women are too young yet also won’t admit it’s because they are in some sense still children.

[lurking_swe]

but as someone in my 30s, it’s kind of true…looking back.

I can only speak as a man. I spent my late teens thinking with my penis instead of my brain. Things worked out well for me by pure luck.

Most teens have no real experience with “real” relationships or what makes a great life partner. This is CRUCIAL when parenting. They’re also not thinking about a stable career so they can actually support a baby. Never mind the money…most jobs in the U.S. have garbage health insurance, unless your employer is great.

Many people THINK they know what their life should look like. Then again most teens think they have life figured out lol. A tale as old as time…

I would say mid 20s is an ideal time from a maturity perspective. The best time depends on the person obviously. You can’t plan falling in love. :)

[xboxnolifes]

At least with people in my circle of the US, it feels like there's an increasing infantilizing of people (frequently themselves, I'm a bit guilty of this), particularly in regards to things like marriage and raising a family. Yet, by 19 you'll have either made decisions for yourself or someone else has for you, that will likely put you on track for your entire future career direction (education, interests, college choice, maybe even enlisted in the military).

You don't need to have given "definitive thought" to your entire future to not be a child anymore.

[phyzix5761]

We definitely need better COL but I'm not convinced it's is the main factor for low birth rates as most countries living in poverty have very high birth rates. I think its a cultural difference that values earlier marriage and heavy family involvement in raising children which, the latter, reduces the stress of having to parent by yourself.

[conductr]

I think there’s a middle ground where in the US many people would be having kids around 30 if they could afford it. Our recent past reflects that. Even the number of kids have been reduced as the cost has become too high, so it’s not parenthood or responsibility alone people are avoiding. Comparing to poverty situations introduces a whole plethora of variables. Kids are seen more as assets than liabilities, as they will care for you in old age and/or can contribute to the household after the first dozen or so years. This is not really a comparison to the rich nations.