[treetalker]

Speaking as a user, and offering my own preferences / process FWIW:

My goal is to simplify and have as few apps as possible. If I download a new app, it's always on probation. It needs to reduce my cognitive load, save my time, make my life appreciably better. If it doesn't, or if the juice isn't worth the squeeze, I delete it.

Regardless, I immediately default to no notifications. Don't ask me to turn on notifications: I'm not an idiot, so I figure the app has some notification mechanism if I want it; and I figure I can activate it in a place called Settings; so I'll handle it myself if I decide to later, thanks. The insult to my intelligence just wasted seconds of my life and limited attention and mental bandwidth, none of which I'll ever get back — so, strike 1!

I prefer to poll. If polling is not enough, I'll set up scheduled notifications. If that's not enough (maybe the app is Messages or one that alerts me that my house is burning or my children have been kidnapped — who knows!) then I'll turn on notifications. But even on Messages — perhaps the only app I want to hear go ding — I mute notifications for a lot of contacts/threads.

So if the app isn't helpful; or stops being helpful; or becomes a burden, through annoying notifications or otherwise — sayonara.

[kajolshah_bt]

This is really helpful. That matches what I’ve seen too, but you’ve explained it more clearly than most product docs ever do.

The part that stands out to me is how default notification prompts feel like an insult to intelligence rather than a value exchange. A lot of teams treat “turn on notifications” as a growth lever, when for users like you it’s already strike one.

Have you ever kept an app around without notifications because the pull was strong enough on its own? Or is the bar now basically “silent by default, prove value first?”

Trying to understand whether mute is more about notification behavior specifically or a broader signal that the app hasn’t earned ongoing attention yet.

[treetalker]

> is the bar now basically “silent by default, prove value first?”

Nowadays, yes — with a couple notable exceptions, discussed below.

In the past, I immediately accepted / allowed notifications for apps like task managers and calendar — because I figured I needed alerts about important deadlines and appointments so I wouldn't miss them! But now even on those I allow badges but not notifications, because I realized that needing them meant I wasn't doing what I needed to do: work in such a way that I know the deadlines by heart and I fulfill them early, and work from my calendar (also knowing it more or less by heart, having a good sense of time, and disciplining myself to stay on track / on schedule and to respect time agreements I made with others and/or myself). Practicing and developing the discipline was what I needed, and the notifications were a crutch and further atrophied my self-management and executive function. (And too many notifications kept me in a tizzy and interfered with my work anyway — a vicious cycle!)

Now the exceptions I mentioned. In my first response I said that I only want to get notifications from Messages. That wasn't entirely accurate. If I set a timer (say, for a work period) or a fleeting reminder (say, to remind me that my laundry needs to be switched to the dryer in an hour) then I want to hear a notification. That also goes for the one third-party app I downloaded, kept, and use with "notifications": a wake-up alarm that uses haptics only, vibrating to wake me up without disturbing my significant other. The unifying threads of these examples are that they are time-based; notifications are essential to the apps' functionality (e.g., you can't have an alarm without some kind of alert or notification); and I'm still specifically directing the apps to notify me about one-off items. None of these notify me without my say-so, and I never get an unexpected notification from them.

> Have you ever kept an app around without notifications because the pull was strong enough on its own?

Well, if I understand the question correctly, since I default to no notifications, every app still on my phone got kept because it proved its value and non-annoyance / user respect over time.

If instead you're asking whether I immediately decided to keep an app always and forever because it was so valuable, no: apps can and do change, and my needs change, so apps are always on the chopping block and must perpetually provide value. And I regularly review all my apps for that value and delete ruthlessly.

[kajolshah_bt]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I totally get where you’re coming from on notifications. It’s like apps that bombard you with prompts or notifications right away are almost disrespecting your time and focus. It really is about having apps that respect your attention and only interrupt when it’s truly necessary.

I love how you’ve shifted from needing constant reminders to building your own system to stay on top of things. I think that's something a lot of people can relate to. The idea of relying less on reminders and more on our own discipline.

It also reminds me of some of the newer trends I’ve seen in app development, like smarter notifications that are way more thoughtful about when to get your attention. I wrote a blog on how AI is helping mobile apps do just that, making notifications more useful without being a nuisance. If you’re curious, I shared a bit about it here: [AI Features in Mobile Apps for 2026 - https://www.budventure.technology/blog/ai-features-mobile-ap...]