[tombert]

You guys are idiots. I got an entire TV network to tell everyone I’m the fastest 100m sprinter in the world so that title should belong to me.

[Jamesbeam]

I just revised all the footage from the birds in your area and couldn’t find any proof of your claims.

Lying to the Bird Intelligence Agency is a Feral catcrime.

[tombert]

The birds, who many people are saying aren't even real, are SPREADING LIES from the RADICAL LEFT claiming I can't run 100 meters!

[treetalker]

Meters and seconds (AND THEREFORE SPEED AND ACCELERATION) are a CON JOB and CONSPIRACY of the RADICAL LEFT!!1! Thank you for your attention to this TRUTHING! covfefe