[niemandhier]

This is dangerous advice.

You need to read the situation very carefully:

Antisocial behavior is often an attempt to gain status in the subjects in-group. Breaking rules in a way conveys power.

Violence against members of the out-group is an even more effective way to display dominance and hence gain status.

Unless you play a repeated game with the other person there is little to gain for you by initiating conflict.

Even if you assume you have something to gain, always consider the other person might have little to lose and ( my opinion) never display aggression you are not willing to back up.

Sources: 1. Rory Miller: ”Meditations on Violence”

2. Life experiences, that match 1’s observations

[getdoneist]

The advice is not about initiating a conflict. It is about not to appear an easy victim in order not to provoke aggression.

But life is always about fight-or-flight, so flight should remain an option, very often the best one.

By not signalling readiness to fight back, you increase probability of aggression by removing all costs to the potential perpetrator from their calculation.

[niemandhier]

This binary classification is what is dangerous in this case.

“Are you looking at my girl?”

1. “Fuck off, if you want to live”.

2. Try to run.

Both options are valid but you miss the: “Just zoning out mate. Hard day at work, you know? Boss dogged my pay and I have to muster up the courage to tell the misses. She’s been talking about leaving and taking the kids …”

Violence can arise at many different levels of the classical hierarchy of needs.

Existencial: A crack head robber in a crisis, needing to feed their habit, is hard to deter by threat. For them it is life or death, for you it is just money.

Self actualisation : Many serial killers preferred easy victims. Looking ready to defend one self most likely would dissuade them.

Social: A member of a social group, trying to establish status by conflict with an outsider? Looking tough might achieve just the opposite of what one intends. But being a type of non-target, simply because one is outside of the established hierarchy can work really well.

My perspective is probably skewed: In my by now admittedly boring life, violence is usually social and best side stepped.