[cuttothechase]

Sergey's challenge looks like is not in retiring early or with non-work.

We had a high performing co-worker who was scared witless after a lay-off episode and this was not because he was worried about lacking money or loss of prestige., but because he could not come to terms with the simple fact of facing the 9 am on a Monday morning with absolutely no expectations. It freaked so much to not feel the hustle and the adrenaline rush of experiencing the blues Monday morning!?

Another colleague used to drive up to the parking lot of their previous employer, post lay-off., so that he could feel normal., and he did this for well over 6 - 8 months. Pack bags, wave to his wife and family, drive up in his Porsche to the parking lot and I guess feel normal !?

[kshacker]

I took a four-year break from work (2009–2013) and moved to India. The reasons were simple: some family health issues required downtime (though probably not as much as I ended up taking), and I could afford to do this in India in a way I couldn’t in the US. This happened to coincide with the market bottom, but I wasn’t laid off—it was entirely voluntary.

I didn’t experience an identity crisis for a single day. I didn’t feel insecure or anxious about not working. The only real friction came from my family.

One big difference was social life. In India, I was constantly meeting people—connections were easy and organic. In the US, maintaining a daytime social life felt much harder. Everyone is on a treadmill—insurance, income, careers—often not by choice. I know there are ways to build community here, but in India it just happened naturally.

My extended family struggled more than I did. Once it became clear the break wasn’t temporary, there was a kind of quiet depression around it. I initially framed it as “taking a breather” by doing an executive MBA, but the break never really ended.

What eventually brought me back wasn’t overt pressure, but practical limits: my spouse’s mental health, and the constraints of India’s education system for our partially disabled, special-ed child. Those realities mattered more than any career concern.

[ericmay]

> One big difference was social life. In India, I was constantly meeting people—connections were easy and organic. In the US, maintaining a daytime social life felt much harder. Everyone is on a treadmill—insurance, income, careers—often not by choice. I know there are ways to build community here, but in India it just happened naturally.

The primary reason for this is the built environment we live in here in the United States. It's very difficult to organically build connections when you have to drive a car somewhere to have basic social interactions. Even some of the items you mention, like insurance and income are very much informed by the requirement to have a car to participate in society.

[geodel]

I don't know if it is build environment or cultural thing. In US showing up at friends, or neighbors unannounced and spend hour or two would be very odd if not downright impolite. But in India it is something everyone would do or at least used to do a 15-20 yrs back when I was there.

One simple reason I think is overall US is very rich so people just can have anything they need on their own and sharing small things which lead to more interaction is simply not needed.

[ericmay]

It's a little of both but the built environment is the primary issue.

We have neighbors - sometimes we need someone to grab a package, or we make too much food and we share, &c. or we run into each other walking to a restaurant or through the park. But this isn't the norm. We live in a neighborhood built before the introduction of cars, so homes are built a little bit closer together, but not too close, and we have mixed-use developments and a good level of density to support restaurants and other amenities.

You can't have spontaneous interactions like that easily in the United States because we build too much sprawl, visiting people or showing up to a bar requires a drive, and in the end you wind up just staying at home participating in surrogate activities like social media.

It really comes down solely to cars and car-only infrastructure that degrades our social interactions to an extreme extent.

-edit-

I do want to mention, at least when I was a kid/teenager I recall we used to show up to people's houses uninvited/unannounced too. But we did not talk to our neighbors. That was a weird thing. There are some cultural things here. But also even if we wanted to visit someone, well, gotta hop in the car. Maybe stop and get gas, and the next thing you know, eh it's too much effort. Might as way stay home. That's kind of how that works. The car-only model that is implemented in most of America, particularly the cities not so much rural areas, is a leading cause of cultural and social malaise I believe in the West.

[massysett]

I don’t think the built environment is that determinative. I live in a car-dependent suburb. Walk Score 2.

My neighbor knows the whole street. She knows the garbage men. It’s because she wants to. When I run into her outside, she chats. She walks her dog and chats with dog owners and anyone else she sees.

Easy relationships are available at the grocery store, post office, etc. I’ve been seeing some of the same people working at Costco for years. I don’t know them. It’s not the built environment. I’d need to take effort to build a relationship with them. My neighbor would. I’m simply not so inclined.

[bombcar]

This is an incredibly important point - you could remove the car entirely, even make you dependent on others (as you're dependent - or were before self checkout - on the Costco clerk) - and you still would have the disconnect.

Hardship can force it more often, perhaps, but that is accidental and secondary.

In all the times I've traveled on forms of "mass transit" (airplanes, subways, trains) the only time I've ever really talked to someone was at the seat-together dining on a long-distance train. Otherwise you can sit next to someone for 20+ hours and never say much more than "excuse me" if you need to use the restroom.

(Another counter to this is kids, if you have kids and there are kids anywhere within screaming distance, they will find each other and immediately be best friends. Parents get dragged along - https://www.bluey.tv/watch/season-2/cafe/ )

[ericmay]

It's absolutely the built environment. Your Costco example is a clear example. you drive to Costco, you walk in, grab generic packaged goods without needing to really talk to anyone, and then go to the checkout and use the automated kiosk to make your purchase.

There's no reason to have a human interaction, so why would you bother getting to know the cashier? You're never going to build a relationship with the cashier precisely because of the environmental structure.

Contrast that with walking down the street to a local store that one of your neighbors owns. I bet you would already have a relationship unless you chose not to. Why? Because you'd also see them at your kids birthday party, or you'd see them at the bark down the street, or out on a walk.

[palmotea]

> One simple reason I think is overall US is very rich so people just can have anything they need on their own and sharing small things which lead to more interaction is simply not needed.

That's a very interesting observation!

I have a theory that reducing "friction" is actually a net negative after a certain point, and US society is way past that point. But everybody keeps doing it, because they're myopically focused on little problems and don't see the big picture or down have a full understanding of all the alternatives.

People need external constraints, because those are the things that keep certain internal drives under control.

It's like when food was scarce it made sense to gorge yourself on calorie rich things and avoid physical effort unless absolutely necessary. Now that food is abundant and it's actually possible to nearly completely eliminate physical activity, we have an obesity epidemic, because those drives no longer hit external limits and are now out of control.

[janandonly]

I am 1,5 years into a break. Haven’t had time to feel bored yet. But I do look forward to a 9-5 job again, just for the structure it provides.

[kshacker]

If you can afford it, why get back? Now after a dozen years I am bored of my 9-5 but running the race to make my FIRE numbers plus provide some cushion for my son with disabilities but if I had a choice I would quit again ( but I am much older now )

[marcus_holmes]

I took a career break and was weirded out by the question of "how do I introduce myself?". So used to saying "Hi, I'm Marcus, I'm IT Director of <business>" that suddenly having nothing to say there was strange. When people asked "what do you do?" I had no good answer, and that felt like I had no good identity.

I guess for Sergey Brin it's a little different, he will always be "Founder of Google" even if he leaves Google.

But that "work as identity" may still be a problem. For a lot of us, what we do is who we are, and so not having any work to do is like not having an identity.

[burner420042]

You're describing my father. Now that he's retired his lack of hobbies is really catching up to him. His only hobby has been working and I've noted this about him since I was an adolescent and decided then as something I would not emulate.

A few times I've quit a FAANG job with no plan for after other than to wander, and both times the lack of professional competition meant not just coasting horizontally but that I was actually lowering myself somehow. Hard to explain, and I don't fully understand it.

I also noticed most people, especially women, determine your value by your 'right now'. While intentionally unemployed I'd answer truthfully and with a smile, 'I'm unemployed!' which visibly confused people.

[throwaway98797]

life is phase oriented

when i’m working i find retired people boring

when im taking 6+ month break i find the nervous energy of employed people annoying

ultimately, comfort comes from being around like minded people

then again seeking comfort rings hollow to me, even though it’s quite enjoyable in the moment.

[james_marks]

This is especially true around NYC, SF, LA. The culture is built around accomplishment and work identity.

Much less true in other places (e.g. Midwest), where community / taking care of others is valued.

[mrguyorama]

>While intentionally unemployed I'd answer truthfully and with a smile, 'I'm unemployed!' which visibly confused people.

The proper term is "Funemployed"

[cap11235]

"gainfully unemployed" is a fun one to use.

[RobRivera]

The people worth knowing were the ones enthusiastically socializing with me after uttering that phrase.

[weinzierl]

> So used to saying "Hi, I'm Marcus, I'm IT Director of <business>" [..]

Risking a stereotype. In my experience from traveling the world it's a tell-tale sign for being from a culture heavily influenced by the Protestant work ethic. Introduce yourself like that in Spain, Italy, or Brazil and you'll get strange looks.

On the flip side, I've found that people who do not define themselves through their work primarily often do so through family. My younger self is certainly guilty of giving someone a strange look when within the first five minutes of meeting them, they told me whose cousin they were.

[throw101010]

In a business/formal context it would be normal to introduce yourself like this in the countries you've mentioned.

Do people introduce themselves like that in informal contexts in the USA? If so that's indeed a bit weird, and more a topic you would start talking about for small talk or if someone asked about it.

[endemic]

I would find it strange if someone introduced themselves to me with their business title. I sometimes ask "what do you do for a living?" as small talk, but that's solicited.

[ryandrake]

Even when it's solicited, I think it's weird. I don't tell people what I do for a living when I introduce myself. And when they ask, I tell them I'm an exotic dancer. It's a silly joke (since I'm a fat 50 year old) that tends to break the ice and lighten up the conversation. In general, I think small-talking about what you do for a living is not really interesting to people, and just allows them to silently put you somewhere on their mental totem pole of importance. Better to talk about actual interests.

[dpark]

> Better to talk about actual interests.

For many people, what they do for work is by far their biggest interest.

Many people have few to zero hobbies. They fill their days with work and then distraction.

[dopidopHN2]

Depends on where. In big city yes

[abraxas]

Americans don't usually have friends. Just "contacts". Working age "parties" are often just cloaked networking events.

[stuxnet79]

Not sure why this is being downvoted. It is very much true in my opinion, especially so for the big coastal metro areas.

[marcus_holmes]

Agree, it's definitely a cultural thing.

I've also lived on a small island where on first meeting, two locals will work out how they're related. I guess similar to the cousin thing.

In the city I currently live in, it's fairly normal for locals to ask where another local went to school within 5 mins of meeting them, because that establishes an identity here.

[Mc_Big_G]

Correct. If you said your title in Spain, you'll get a strange look and someone might respond with "why would you tell me that?". No one there cares what you do for work.

[yibg]

Not very common as the intro, but pretty common around here (bay area) to get asked that pretty soon after the intro. I don't like it, and I wished people didn't focus so much on it though.

[xfalcox]

First time I was in San Francisco and someone introduced themselves like that, going even beyond, was indeed a super weird experience being a brazilian.

[lucianbr]

What is the point of the "I'm Marcus" part of your introduction? Reading your post I get the impression it has zero value, or at least you think so.

> Hi, I'm Marcus

> What do you do Marcus

> I'm on a break now, but I used to be a director of IT

Is this really difficult? Seems really easy, and I was never a director of anything. Maybe that's the problem.

[jaapz]

For some people, their work/job is just such a big part of their identity, that for them this is a problem. That is I guess the point the person you were replying to was trying to make.

It's also not really weird for a job to become such a big part of your identity, when people spend most of their time at work or at home thinking about their work.

[phrotoma]

A couple years ago a friend of mine mentioned that he had known another mutual friend of ours for many years, much longer than I would have guessed. I asked him "what does he do?" and he thought for a moment before saying "you know ... I have no idea, it has never come up".

Definitely one of his more interesting qualities.

[foobarian]

I don't know if this is acceptable in the US, but I always found it distasteful when people ask about your job 30 seconds into meeting you. I think it's much more polite to talk about generic stuff until jobs or skills come up naturally. Sometimes, they just never do, and that's fine. Need to know!

[jasode]

>For some people, their work/job is just such a big part of their identity, that for them this is a problem.

That's only 1/2 of the dynamic. People also like to assign an identity to others.

For example, if I say, "I'm semi-retired." ... the follow-up question is always "Oh, so what did you do before that?" ... which is polite coded-speak for, "Did you inherit money or what work did you do for money that put you in the position to do that?"

People are naturally curious about your rough level of success, wealth, expertise, etc. Having a "no identity" stance isn't really a satisfactory answer for many listeners. They want to know more.

EDIT to replies: I do understand the harmless "small talk" aspect. I should've added more to re-emphasize the "people assigning identity" aspect.

Once I reply to the followup question with "Oh, I used to do consulting for finance" what then happens is others then introduce me as "And this is jasode -- he was a consultant for X". My ex-consultant life that I last did over 15 years ago is now part of a tagline/subheading associated with my name even though I never intended it.

The point is other people have this irresistible urge to "fill in the blank" with an identity -- especially an identity that is tied to how one earned money. I'm not complaining about this and it's just an observation of what humans naturally do.

[mr_mitm]

It's also a low risk topic that can generate lots of follow up questions. It's regular small talk. Also, people here seem to downplay it, but doesn't it tell you a lot about a person what they do roughly half of their waking time? What they chose to do with their life? Sure, you're not your job or your career, but it's also a very normal part about getting to know someone and I'm not sure equating it to some way of gauging success levels is necessarily to right way to think about it.

[jasode]

>It's regular small talk. Also, people here seem to downplay it, but doesn't it tell you a lot about a person what they do roughly half of their waking time? What they chose to do with their life?

Having a natural ebb & flow to conversation is all true but that's not the issue. Let me restate it differently.

It's ok and natural to ask what people do/did for work. It's also natural to respond and share what was a significant aspect of their life.

The meta-observation is: others then like to compress whatever life narrative they hear into a "shorthand" or "identity" -- even if the recipient never intended it to be his/her identity. Several parent comments mention "their work being their identity is the problem". My point is that the identity we get tagged with is often outside of our control and we didn't create the problem of work being our identity.

My neighbors know me as the "ex-consultant". For that identity to change, I'd have to do something new that was significant enough to override that ... such as... get into another career, open a restaurant, become founder of a startup, etc.

How does one have "no identity related to their job"? Sometimes you can't unless one wants to be evasive about what one does to earn money.

[pixl97]

>It's also a low risk topic

In modern life, yes. I wonder if it was such a low risk topic as we moved towards the past? For example the fear of the stranger is something that is very common in past writing across a number of cultures. If you met a stranger and they said they were a soldier it would have different ramifications than if they said they were a baker. Also in smaller social groups that required the work of everyone to survive it was a way of measuring the resources available in said group.

[inglor_cz]

It is not just about assigning identity to others.

I am probing for topics of mutual interest, or topics that make other people passionate, to learn more about them generally.

In some people, this is completely orthogonal to their careers, but most of the time, there is an overlap. Like, I haven't yet met a railway engineer who wasn't a raging railway nerd at the same time.

[yibg]

> People are naturally curious about your rough level of success, wealth, expertise, etc.

I definitely find this more true in some cultures. e.g. silicon valley, it seems people want to know where you're at on the "hierarchy". Many parts of Asia too, you get treated differently if you're a low level worker, regular worker, executive etc.

[marcus_holmes]

Well, the "I'm Marcus" part is saying "I would like you to call me Marcus" I guess.

You're right, it is easy to say. But there's an identity and professional pride and all sorts of stuff wrapped up in the job title that isn't so easy to let go of.

It also leads on to questions like "and what are you doing now?" which get to "I'm lazing around doing nothing because my mental health took a hammering while I was IT Director", and so on. It's all so much easier and tidier with the job title.

[lucianbr]

Sounds really sad. I am not a director of anything, I probably make almost nothing compared to you, and yet I know who I am outside of my job. I have friends who value who I am, regardless of my job or even between jobs. I would not trade places with you for all the money in the world. I would not have any use for all that money then.

[singleshot_]

It's like when people say their pronouns, but for nouns.

[dmitrygr]

> When people asked "what do you do?"

I found that outside of CA, this is asked a lot less often. In CA people ask that so they can mentally rank you as worth their time or not. Elsewhere, people ask you how your weekend went, or how your family is. One of the awesome parts of moving to Austin was not hearing that as the first question as much.

[alexjplant]

> I found that outside of CA, this is asked a lot less often.

I moved to California a few years ago from the Least Coast (insert shaka, surfer, wave emojis here) and had multiple other out-of-towners in the same situation as me say the exact opposite at a party. They all were adamant that they had yet to hear "what do you do [for a living]?" since they'd moved as they did ad nauseum when they lived on the other side of the country.

I've not noticed either way. My pet theory is that people hear this frequently if their social and professional lives bleed into each other which they do if one lives in a town dominated by a specific industry or profession. Those moving westward during COVID and remote work suddenly had to contend with this much less.

[zippyman55]

Never hear that question either. I don’t ask it either. I’ve actually been pretty successful but asking that question seems to rank someone on a scale that does not reflect their amazing contributions to society.

[alexjplant]

I ask because a) I'm interested in the same way that a child is in what people's jobs are and b) it gives me a frame of reference for interacting with them conversationally vis a vis common ground.

Wealth signaling still seems to me to be done primarily by conspicuous consumption and expensive hobbies.

[Klonoar]

It’s so commonly asked in DC that it’s been a meme in dating circles there for decades.

[mckn1ght]

I’ve found asking “what do you like to do” vs “what do you do” to produce much more interesting conversation.

[stavros]

I really don't like getting asked what I do for a living. I exchange labour for money somewhere out of necessity, what's at all interesting about that? What I do in my free time is who I am, and that's much more interesting to talk about, to me.

[oefrha]

I don’t like getting asked what I do for hobbies. The real answer I want to give is “none of your business”, but I’m polite enough to never say that, so it gets awkward.

Getting asked what I do for a living is totally fine. It’s on my website, the whole world can find out if they bother to search. I’ll save you a search.

The point is people are different. Not everyone wants to share their private interests with you, especially if you just met. What you consider interesting conversation, well, for some of us it’s just intrusive. I also don’t care what you like to do 99% of the time. I’ve been socially forced to sit through way too many of these “interesting conversations”.

[mckn1ght]

Could we be thinking about different social situations? I’m not turning to people on the bus and asking what their hobbies are. And it’s not my first question of people visiting my office happy hour.

If you’re at my home for dinner, I hope anyone that still feels this way does answer “the details of my private life are none of your business” when I’m trying to get to know them as a friend, so I know never to waste another good meal on them.

[dirkc]

I sometimes joke and say that I type for a living, not entirely untrue. But I've found that sometimes people are offended if I answer their question evasively

[dopidopHN2]

I work in a buttons factory

[dirkc]

sometime I say "push buttons for a living" instead of typing :)

Can also describe my job as 'endlessly deliberate over the placement of pixels'

[pastorhudson]

I always ask “What do you do for fun?”

[scottyah]

Same! I love the pregnant pause after "What do you do..." as they start to mentally draw up their usual work spiel before adding the "...for fun" to flip the conversation around and actually get their brain thinking and exploring beyond the standard conversation flows.

[scotty79]

> When people asked "what do you do?"

"I mostly breathe. It's a bore but you gotta do it"

"I meant for a living"

"Same"

[blitzar]

"waste management"

[throw101010]

I'd say we moreso produce waste than manage it as humans. We seem actually pretty bad at managing it unfortunately.

[2muchcoffeeman]

Who were you before you got a job? No one? Nothing?

I identify more with myself as a child than I ever did with my work.

Why would I identify with someone else’s goals that I’m being paid to help achieve?

[scottyah]

If you ever get to talk to people who are more than laborers trading time for dollars, it is great fun. When dollars are just one of the many rewards from their career (where a person spends like 80% of their life energy), you get to hear a lot of passion, learning and growth. It really is a whole different way to live.

[jonfromsf]

After a decade, "founder of X that I no longer work at" is considered a lame answer. People want to know what you are doing now, not your highest claim to status of your entire life.

[rwmj]

Make up a name, print some business cards, and be a "director" (or whatever title you like) of your own Potemkin company.

[QuercusMax]

When I lived in the bay area for a few years, everybody would tell you where they worked, and if you didn't tell them, they'd ask. Since moving to Portland, I've definitely noticed that people are much more interested in what you do during your leisure time.

[intended]

Hoo boy, this is definitely a weird one to navigate, especially if you have a weird set of roles. It takes time to settle various threads and figure out how to address this.

[triceratops]

> "what do you do?"

"Whatever I feel like"

[blitzar]

> So used to saying "Hi, I'm Marcus, I'm IT Director of <business>"

Tech bros would mock Finance bros who would open a conversation with anyone who would listen with "Hi, I'm Marcus, I work at Goldman Sachs" and yet here we are now ...

"Hi, I'm Marcus, I work at Google"

[amelius]

I don't get this. Just find a coworking space and work on a FOSS project.

[cheschire]

Seriously. There are so many opportunities to give back to society. One does not need formal employment to be fulfilled.

I will say in Sergey Brin’s case, he had the unique opportunity to go back to work with the best and brightest without any friction, and nobody could tell him “hey maybe your credentials don’t quite stack up high enough for this department yeah?”

But for the rest of us, there’s FOSS, there’s computer repair, home automation, day trading a small fraction of your wealth, volunteer work at hospitals and libraries, gig work apps like taskrabbit…

If you are bored after being away from work for even a month, I’m not sure I could be friends with you.

[jart]

I left Google to build an open source project a long time ago. A big part of the appeal was being able to have something to work on that's truly mine. Sergey already has something that's his and it's called Google. So I think he belongs there.

[fragmede]

The world thanks you for your work. Which one of yours is your favorite?

[jart]

Cosmopolitan has been my baby for a while. It may not be my most popular project, but it's the secret sauce that powers everything else.

[wslh]

I think it's difficult for a normal brain to live with the low impact of another project while you created Google. Also, the speed of a personal developer is nothing compared with the speed of a software engineering area or company. You can easily feel like a turtle even working on an interesting project.

[unsupp0rted]

Mental illness. They tied their entire sense of self to some job at some company. Their body belongs in some parking lot on somebody's schedule.

[heyjamesknight]

A mentally healthy person wants to be helpful. They want to be seen as helpful and they expect others around them to be helpful as well. This is the foundation of "pro-social" behavior: I benefit the group as much or more than the group benefits me.

Tying your identity to the place where you're helpful and where that help is appreciated and acknowledged isn't mental illness.

[WJW]

But this person was laid off. His help was (apparently) not appreciated, and he's not helping anyone by sitting alone in his car on the parking lot.

Do you think it is healthy behavior to go to a parking lot at 0900 every day and do nothing because you mentally cannot face the idea of not going to an office?

[fragmede]

> His help was (apparently) not appreciated

That's just your take. We don't know where he sat in the team, so we can assume the idea that he wasn't appreciated by his teammates as incorrect. He didn't make the cut based on unknown metrics from upper management, but they have their own reasons for doing things.

Getting in to the parking lot of the old office sounds way healthier than not making it out of bed at all.

[WJW]

What a weird dichotomy. It's not between "sitting in your old employers' parking lot" and "lying in bed all day", it's between "sitting in your old employers' parking lot" and "learning new skills", "finding a new job", "discovering new hobbies", "spending more time with your loved ones" or almost anything else.

Instead he chose to sit alone in a parking lot so he could feel "normal". Feeling compelled to do a specific action (excluding things like breathing) just to feel normal has a name, and that name is "addiction". It is not usually considered a good thing.

[pardon_me]

He didn't just drive there and sit in the car for a week or so either, which could be a shock reaction or wanting to keep the routine going whilst looking for the next thing to do... He was doing this for 6-8 months. It reveals a lot about a "rational" crowd.

[Melatonic]

They could go anywhere though - why not go to a coffee shop at 9 with a laptop or on a morning hike? I agree sitting in bed depressed would be bad but it seems like avoiding the issue to specifically sit in the parking lot of an old employer.

At minimum I think it would be healthier to tie part of your identify to an aspect of your career you enjoy rather than a specific employer itself.

[unsupp0rted]

> Getting in to the parking lot of the old office sounds way healthier than not making it out of bed at all.

Missing your ex and lying around depressed in bed is less unhealthy than getting into the car and sitting outside their house.

[heyjamesknight]

You've cherry-picked a situation where there is an obvious social norm being broken. A better example would be going to the park and sitting on the bench you used to sit on with your ex. I agree with GP that this is healthier than lying despondent in bed.

[heyjamesknight]

Coping mechanisms are complex and diverse. The individual in question lost a major source of meaning-making in their life and was struggling to cope with that loss. I don't believe this is any less healthy than other common responses, which range from societal withdrawal to substance abuse.

[fuzzy_biscuit]

I hear what you're saying, but routines, especially long-lived, are difficult to break/change. It's normal to have phantom limbs when they are cut off.

[tempsaasexample]

These people could have bought a dirt bike or mountain bike and had the time of their life. I don't get it.

[melling]

I think I’d take directing big things at Google over riding a dirt bike…

I’m not actually sure what you don’t get.

I’m all for not living a lower level grind and riding a dirt bike. Most jobs simply aren’t interesting.

[Melatonic]

If you're a director at Google you can probably afford a pretty damn nice dirt bike if that's your jam

[throwaway132448]

It’s the lack of imagination that’s sad.

[Xiol]

Regretting not being able to create more shareholder value on your deathbed.

So very sad.

[fragmede]

Depends on the shareholder. At Sergey Brin's level, that shareholder value shapes the future of humanity, a legacy affecting many more people and will last far longer than spending time with single, or even double digit number of children.

[__jonas]

I can't really tell what you're trying to say, do you really think the shareholder value of Google is positively aligned with the future of humanity? As in: If Google builds a really good AI and makes a lot of money from that, this will be a net positive for the world?

[Klonoar]

You’re shifting the goalpost to be positive influence or not. That’s not what they were saying though.

Their point is that the sheer allure for many people of that level of influence is powerful and makes other options likely less appealing.

[twalichiewicz]

I recently rewatched a Tested Q&A where Adam Savage discussed his post-Mythbusters life; his framing of that duality was very similar: https://youtu.be/2tZ0EGJIgD8?t=322.

It aligns with a common design principle: constraints often make a problem space easier to navigate. I suspect life is similar. Having limited time creates a "specialness" that is easily lost when you suddenly have an infinite amount of time at your disposal.

[looperhacks]

It's not THAT bad for me, but I really can't take vacation days for "nothing". I struggle if I don't have plans and work really forces one to have some structure. If you need the structure and don't have any plans post lay-off, I can believe the struggle to "let go" and do something better.

[YeahThisIsMe]

That must be what it's like to have a job where you feel like you're doing something interesting and meaningful.

[shadowgovt]

Human beings tend to enjoy patterns. Being pushed out of a pattern engages a lot of survival instincts.

[wartywhoa23]

> drive up in his Porsche to the parking lot

I wonder if that'd still be the case should he drive a Ford Focus.

[freehorse]

If he drove a Ford Focus and did this everyday, I bet they would have called the police.

[beambot]

Sounds a bit... Neurodivergent.

[csomar]

I am guessing if you have been doing this daily for a couple decades then the neurodivergence is not going through this. I assume any normal person will find it hard to not do any kind of work and if you spent 20 years of your life doing tech, how useful are in the "real" world. Unless you have been doing handy work on the sides, spoiler alert: not much.

[mr_toad]

‘You don’t have to be neurodivergent to work here… …but it helps!’

[compsciphd]

he should have carved into the parking lot "Brooks Was Here"

[scotty79]

[flagged]

[stavros]

When you define yourself solely by work, you lose your entire identity when you retire. Most people don't have hobbies, so work is literally the one thing they have in their lives.

[renegade-otter]

This is why people should have an opportunity to semi-retire when they are still young. A year or two. United States safety net does not really allow that unless you are loaded already.

It's very helpful to zoom out and do LIFE for a change. I got laid off three years ago, started my own project. Didn't take off, but also two mini-mes showed up during that time, and I am infinitely grateful that I could punt on work and just be there.

Hashtag blessed and all. That backrent I owe now, well, that's a bitch.

[le-mark]

English surnames would seem to indicate being identified by one’s work has a long history (smith, miller, cooper, …)

[scotty79]

It's really interesting that my comment here where I said that employment can inflict brain damage got flagged even though previous comment described behavior that would be obviously significant clinical symptom if it was caused by anything else as it is irrational and detrimental.

[lesuorac]

Wasn't sergey forced out for hitting on employees? It seems pretty reasonable for him to be unhappy with a forced retirement and ultimately unwind it now that meeto is pretty much over.

[renegade-otter]

That is really not healthy.

[skeuomorphism]

What a sad way to live life, for a man to miss the chains he wears in enslavement, for he knows nothing else