[makeitdouble]

Looking at it from the other way, your mom probably didn't change her name because it's not a big deal where you live ?

People getting the issues live in different systems and/or have different needs, and it also changes with our world getting more digital. One part that doesn't much depend on locality this days would be international travel and money.

For international travel, small kids having a different name is surprisingly painful and can get you stuck in an office for hours until it's somewhat clear you're not kidnapping them (proving you're a parent not being enough). Depending on how it goes your plane could be gone by that time.

Money is the same, there;s a lot less check if you send to yourself or family than to a random stranger. Having a different name can mean your transfer getting stuck for days of back and forth.

Then again, if you're just staying in your town never dealing with anything outside of it, you might never have to think about your name in your whole life.

[cortesoft]

My mom got married in the 70s in the US. It wasn't a huge issue, but people did think she was strange.

I never experienced any of what you say as a child. We travelled internationally a number of times, never had anyone tell us she wasn't my mom or anything.

I am not sure what you mean about the money thing. My mom was on my accounts when I was a kid (with different last names) so she could send me money. As an adult, I can't see how sending money would be an issue. My mom and I transfer money to each other fairly often still ($70k recently, went through fine).

I did not stay in my home town. Not sure how they would be relevant.

Again, most people would assume (if they assumed anything) that my parents were divorced, which is incredibly common. Half my friends had different last names from their siblings and/or parent. Blended families are incredibly common.

I am now a dad of two. They have my last name, while my wife (their mom) has a different name. Again, never a problem at doctors or school or anything. They always make you fill out your full name and relationship. Again, super common to have different last names here im California.

[monster_truck]

This happened to my grandparents a few times going back and forth to Canada with me when I was a kid (before 9/11). Even with the birth certificate and whatever else, they can arbitrarily decide to waste your entire day. Better safe than sorry.

I think part of it was because the hospital I was born at was renamed just before I was born, and then demolished not too long after. I've had it trip things up before remembering to mention the original hospital name. Everyone seems generally familiar with the bullshit now, just a matter of remembering to bring it up because they're expecting it.

[thatfrenchguy]

I can’t fathom this being an issue in 2025 where you can have digitized versions of your kid’s birth certificate on your phone, which indicate that you are their parent.

The kidnapping thing has nothing to do with names, if you only have one parent every country has their rules and you should check them out ahead of time.

[makeitdouble]

We did it with every kid/parent and name combination. The only time we where ever asked to show papers was when the names didn't match. It shouldn't be that way, but IME it's a factor.

As you point out, being the parent doesn't really matter in that case, it needs to be proven that both parent agree on the kid leaving the country.

[DanielHB]

> For international travel, small kids having a different name is surprisingly painful and can get you stuck in an office for hours until it's somewhat clear you're not kidnapping them

Passports have your parents name, this might cause the clerk to do a double check to make sure but unless losing you or your children documents you will never run into this. Or if you are travelling without passports (which is okay between some countries) and using documents (like birth certificates) in different languages

[adastra22]

My wife doesn’t share my name or the name of our kids. We travel a lot. This has literally never been an issue ever, anywhere.

[fluidcruft]

I mean the comment they replied to specifically mentioned moving to America. I cannot fathom this being an actual issue in the USA.

[makeitdouble]

To your point(and parent's), it won't be if you're never getting out of the USA nor deal with the rest of the world.

But most people moving in don't cut all ties with their home country nor never touch their passport again I think.

[cortesoft]

We travelled internationally as a family when I was a kid. No one ever mentioned our names being different.

Again, a huge percentage of the population has divorced parents, plus all the kids born out of wedlock. That is like half the population that already don’t have the same last name as at least one of their parents. Everyone who deals with the population is going to encounter this situation every day. They aren’t going to be surprised or confused by a kid with a different name as their parent.

[ricudis]

Did you ever travel internationally along with only one of your parents? I know of many cases around the world where authorities will definitely cause you some trouble if you try to do that, even more if somehow "expected" naming conventions don't match up. At least that's how it's been in the last 2 decades.

[belgiandudette]

I travel multiple times a year internationally with my toddler. She has a different last name than me. No issues whatsoever. Yes, i bring a birth cert and a letter from her mother that we can travel, but no one has ever asked for these.