[DiscourseFan]

I'm currently one of those "management ppl" you are referring, or at least on track to be one, but I swear its not my fault! The industry pays a lot better than any other job I could swing, and my background is very relevant and I know for certain that some of these projects wouldn't run without me. And also, there is no "balance" here, being dorky or "autistic" does not make you a good programmer. There are many brilliant engineers who are also very sociable. Being able to work with others is an important skill and, all else being even, in a highly competitive industry having that kind of skill will get you ahead.

[mcdeltat]

> Being able to work with others is an important skill

Are we seriously claiming that average office socials/politics is no more than being able to play nicely with people?

[DiscourseFan]

Idk where you work but you’d be surprised how bad some people are at it.

[apwell23]

do you mean this when you say 'good at politics'

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=45452724

being sociable isn't same as being good at politics. politics is just politics and it involves backstabbing and trampling over ppl.

not sure why ppl claim that office politics is some spl breed of politics that more noble and nice. "its just ppl skills" narrative is infuriating.

ppl with autism are actually very sociable and friendly.

[DiscourseFan]

I’ve never experienced anything like this in my life, but if I were in that situation I would go straight to the manager who was “mentoring” them and threaten to quit if they genuinely believed the story.

I guess politics is about having balls too. I mean that’s not great what happened but either its true to a certain extent (not saying it is just saying you have to be humble sometimes), or its completely bullshit and you have to stand up for yourself.

Even if it works here, eventually she will try that same trick at another level with someone who is willing to take a bigger risk to get ahead, and they won’t be bluffing. Whole companies can come down because of people who behave like this and if I were the manager in this situation I would see how easily we could offboard this person, even if I thought they did good work in the past.

But as I said, even if she shouldn’tve been using the story to get ahead, and even if you pressure your boss saying you’ll basically quit if she gets promoted over you, there’s a possibility that you did cause a problem and that you have to recognize your own social failings. That’s I guess one of the most important “interpersonal” skills, to never be a victim, even when you have been victimized, and to try and view the situation objectively. You can both be in the wrong here at the same time, there’s no contradiction; recognizing that is an important skill in management.