[bshacklett]

And yet, at the end of the day, I always sleep better knowing that I put the effort in to be a good person, even if it didn’t work out the way I’d hoped.

I get the cynicism; it’s easy to feel like the world is just full of uncaring people sometimes. But, does adding one more help?

[carlosjobim]

You aren't a good person for being subservient. You are a bad person, because you are enabling bad people.

Evil is in most cases a Yin/Yang system of abuser and willing victim. Both are dependent on each other for their common goal of creating evil in this world.

The abuser from primitive motives: "I have to do it to them, because if I'm not an abuser, somebody will make me a victim."

The willing victim because he thinks it's an easy path to be a good person: "I don't have to engage my heart and soul, just take abuse and each "point" of abuse turns into good boy points for me."

There is nothing to be admired about victims and the victim cult is a mistake. They deserve empathy and help, they don't deserve admiration.

[bshacklett]

There’s a lot of pain and anger in this reply. I’m sorry you have had to experience whatever has led you here.

[carlosjobim]

Not at all. It's a reflection on human behaviour, in the content that the other commenter said that you shouldn't concern yourself with bad actors as long as you can later say that "you did the right thing". That can bring you to bad situations, as another poster warned about above.

Taking care to not be an abuser and to not be a victim is rather the best path, even if it demands more from the person. It's easy to just do what others tell you, but it will soon bring misery.

[BeetleB]

> You aren't a good person for being subservient. You are a bad person, because you are enabling bad people.

To stay on topic:

You definitely are not going to be invited to my parties!

[ryandrake]

Wow, what a thread drift! I thought we were talking about inviting friends to have fun.

[matheusmoreira]

It's that hope that things will work out that causes suffering and disappointment.

"I'll be nice, and others will be nice in turn" is magical thinking. There is no such deal in place.

It's perfectly possible for others to soak up all that niceness and then suddenly leave without being equally nice in return. If pressed, they might even say they didn't ask for the goodness that befell them, they were just happy to accept when it was offered, thereby absolving themselves of any obligation.