[lasertron]

I'm sorry you're going through this and I'm joining the chorus of other commenters who empathize with your pain. You've got to seek some help--other than that, here are little things that have helped me:

-blogging (or journaling, if you want to start facing your own thoughts on a micro-level first. both are great.) -read a classic work of literature, read the sparknotes, read the criticisms of the work, decide how you feel about it. relating to themes in literature and philosophy help me deal with the absurdity of real life. -find a cause to support. activism helped me find some motivation and conviction for something outside of my work. -change your space. sell all your stuff and buy some new stuff. changing a rug or rearranging a floor plan can make me feel like I'm somewhere else.

xx