[bikamonki]

It's been many years without social networks for me. At gatherings, I'm often the only one without a phone in my hand, and it feels strange. Eventually, the "phoners" make eye contact and chat a bit, usually about something they all saw on a screen. But it never lasts. They always go back to the screen. It seems silence and quiet time make them uncomfortable. Even in a formal business meeting, screens are open, and attention is lost.

Will decentralized social networks fix this plague? I don't think so. The only thing that works is disconnecting. Just a few weeks into it, you'll realize you have so much free time. Time for hobbies, time for loved ones, time for finding peace and joy, time for creating and sharing. You will regret the thousands of hours wasted on that useless addiction. A few months in, you'll hear the birds singing again. You'll notice the evening skies. You'll find comfort and joy. The time you get back will help you build incredible things.

[creakingstairs]

> At gatherings, I'm often the only one without a phone in my hand, and it feels strange

I’m curious, what country is this from? I’ve been living in NZ and Japan last 5 years and people love their phones here too. But the gatherings (even random meet ups!) almost never have people with phones in their hands.

> Even in a formal business meeting, screens are open, and attention is lost.

This would be considered incredibly rude and would lose businesses here

[medhir]

I agree there’s a ton of benefits from fully disconnecting. I’ve had periods completely off social media which were quite blissful, though I’ve always ended up coming back to some extent due the social aspects you described.

Given the choice between apps controlled by large corporations preying on attention vs decentralized protocols, I’d much rather have the latter.

I think having examples of apps that don’t demand one’s attention so fiercely, or provide better options for tailoring “the algorithm,” are an important step towards ending the mass social media addiction society is currently experiencing.

[Nevermark]

> provide better options for tailoring “the algorithm,”

Instead of a non-obvious "algorithm" with tailoring, just have a social app with a purpose (or per group purpose), and nothing but absolute direct control.

I.e. follow/link with friends, family or whatever in groups. The feed is time-weighted to recent posts or communications. Any other filtering or prioritization can be done, by selection. I.e. deprioritize reposts by default, except persons A, B and C. Etc.

There could be like/dislikes that accumulate into priorities, for those who think that is convenient, but those priorities are just private settings that can be observed and changed.

No hidden/obscure/unclear algorithms, no third parties, no ads, and no Zuck's with any ability to access/impact/insert into the feed.

A scrapbook group, that is just a scrapbook group. Etc.

When did software products/services start "needing" boogymen?

[johnecheck]

The right platform will allow users to choose between any of the algorithms you described and more.

[medhir]

This is pretty much exactly what Bluesky / Blacksky offer in the form of custom feeds. Gives users the ability to choose whatever type of feed they want, algorithm curated or not.

And if you’re unhappy with the selection, you’re free to create your own.

[const_cast]

The best middle ground I've found is checking social media on a web browser on a computer. On my time, when I decide.

I still check Instagram every few weeks just to see what everyone is up to. And it's honestly really nice. I never think about it until I'm thinking "hmm, what is X up to?"

The best part is I don't burn through all the posts in 5 seconds and then get reels suggested. In a few weeks or a couple months, a lot of stuff happens! There's a bunch of cool posts from my friends from me to see, and no algorithmic BS.

[ElijahLynn]

Phones are basically vape pens these days.

[cyrialize]

I've been trying not to browse when I wake up.

Suddenly, I've been having much more free time in the morning!

[repeekad]

“The Pedestrian” by Ray Bradbury comes to mind

[christoph]

This, this, this and more this!!! Sorry, the below is long, but I haven’t really shared before anywhere and it’s just flowed out of me this morning…

I dropped Facebook over 15 years ago, instagram maybe 7 or 8 years ago, Twitter just before Elon took over, Whatsapp and Strava I guess might be the only things I use considered “social” and I have all group notifications muted on WA at all times.

I’ve watched this parallel reality grow and evolve over the years and I hate it. Everyone everywhere seems to be permanently staring at a screen!

A month or so back, I watched my wife awake in the morning, she didn’t realise I was awake watching her (lovingly) - I got Black Mirror IRL - instantly upon awaking, without looking, she reached for her phone and the endless scrolling started, she was so engrossed, after 10 mins not noticing her husband awake, intently watching her, I had to say “Morning”. Later that morning, alone, I wept tears for myself, for her and all of humanity.

Two to three months ago, I had realised that while I wasn’t addicted to social media, I was absolutely addicted to news media/politics/etc. Like a key in a lock, it clicked one day, i’d wasted at least a decade, nearly two of adult life obsessively reading, commenting and talking about UK, global events & politics.

Worse than that, I realised how all the negativity from that world was directly feeding my own negativity and then into those around me. Then after another week or two where I blocked it out entirely at home, I felt “recovered”. My fingers were no longer blindly typing in web addresses in moments of boredom - I’d dip into a book chapter of technical paper for 5 minutes instead. Political podcasts were all dropped, replaced entirely with music and podcasts that don’t engage with political comment.

I was only granted this moment of clarity as I attended a technical conference for a week, where I was up at 7 every morning to hit the early sessions and not getting back to my hotel till nearly 10 or 11pm. Amazingly, the whole week, there was barely a whisper of anything about politics - I think I might have heard the word “Trump” once.

I was so full of energy and excitement about what i’d been learning and talking to people about all week, as soon as I returned to my normal reality, the world of international politics suddenly appeared to me exactly the same way a bottle of booze did after knocking alcohol addiction on the head. The mere mention of any of the MSM trigger words suddenly produced in me a deep feeling of revulsion.

I couldn’t imagine not knowing what was going on in the world 6 months ago, now I actively avoid any mention or conversation that might go that way. The sky hasn’t fallen in, foreign invaders haven’t taken my country, what has happened though is I’ve been devouring books and technical papers like a mad man, learning new instruments, creating art on the computer and finally facing my demons and creating art on paper!

My life has improved beyond all rational logic, probably moreso than quitting alcohol, which was also a horrible, slow growing, hugely negative addiction for me. My emotional state feels more balanced than ever as I’m finally feeling totally free from all the emotional manipulation these things ultimate come with. If something awful happens out in the big bad world painted by the media, I’ll deal with it when it happens as it happens in my actual reality. The best tools I can arm myself with are knowledge, gratitude and love. Sitting around arguing on political blogs has achieved the square root of fuck all and will continue to achieve that.

People seem shocked when they attempt to talk to me about politics and I just shrug my shoulders now. I shudder to think now about the energy I blindly invested into that world, never making one single bit of difference, just generating negativity inside of me, which then spirals out to those I most love around me. When you flip all that negative energy into positive energy, and honestly it really is that easy, you very quickly start getting the insight that maybe you aren’t just human, you’re superhuman.

[phatfish]

I am not a big social media user, to be honest it is too stressful. Minimal social interaction is fine for me, and I'm happy with the boundaries IRL social encounters create where you can walk away (politely at the end of course) and it's over.

News and politics was a big waste of time for me too. Before 2015 I just kept up to date with big issues, but Brexit and then Covid really got me addicted to news and politics.

I ditched Reddit (with the API thing) and news websites about a year ago. It really is nice not knowing about every tiny event. It's not even necessary for being politically aware as so much of the "news" is hearsay and random Tweets turned into content by the media.

I have started looking at the BBC News business section every now and then. This really shows what a content factory other news media sites are. The BBC business page adds new articles maybe twice a day. There is no point checking more often than that (unless you go down a comments rabbit hole).

Sites like The Guardian have new articles hourly and sometimes multiple "live blogs" going on at once. That sort of output can happen in just the "business/economy" section, never mind the rest of the site.

Like social media there is just no way that amount of content can be useful, in fact it's most likely the opposite.

[bikamonki]

I'd bet she was probably scrolling through the endless stream of fear (war, poverty, crime), guilt (diets, fitness, beauty), and shallowness (jokes, celebrities). In those moments with loved ones, I choose to engage, explain what's happening, and make them aware of how it's making them feel. Then I guide them toward alternatives. We play, we cook, we read, we plant, we dance.

It isn't entirely our fault. It's deliberately made and constantly adjusted to be addictive, for the sole purpose of selling ads, swaying votes, counting more MAUs, and increasing valuations.

Still, knowing something is bad for you isn't enough to make you stop, right? Yet, once you are out, you can choose to help others, especially the ones you care about.

[01HNNWZ0MV43FF]

One of the most insidious things about politics news is that there's always more non-actionable trivia factoid bullshit that you can read instead of anything productive

Trump said this? Supreme Court said that? Some poll is up? Okay. That doesn't tell me if we're in danger in my town, that doesn't tell me who's protesting, whose meetings to attend, what our threat model is

It's a sugar fix and it's frustrating when I step back and realize that really caring about politics would start with me leaving the house

[Imustaskforhelp]

Hm yea. I also feel something similar,

maybe just thinking or being internet heroes doesn't matter. Maybe the real change happens at leaving the house.

But I wonder, if that is real change too. Like, maybe the system is so fucked up that even that wouldn't have an impact. Should I invest my energy into such a gamble? maybe, there is no right answer. a part of me who has watched movies and watched good guys win makes me want to say yes but uh reality says otherwise for the most part.

But maybe reality happened because there are people who are on the fence like me who said nah, noone else would do it, then peer pressure happened and welp nobody did anything and that became an evidence for the next generation who can again say nah and the cycle of suffering repeats.

But can this cycle truly change with just the will of one person like me? I doubt that my presense makes a change.

I have started to think that the best way I can make real change is maybe by open sourcing / working in a non profit / maybe helping them with some linux expertise in my community since I love linux. I can set up self hosted stuff for them so that they can control their infrastucture. I can reduce their costs from these bloated app subscription hell holes, maybe help these non profits and donate to the right causes and work on fixing my life too. Does this make sense?

[Imustaskforhelp]

Wow, I was writing a comment trying to defend watching a news, and I realized that basically I have almost become miserable due to news.

Please read the previous comment that I have posted on hackernews for some reference about "freedom", basically its about freedom and how I feel like a lot of issues are political and thus I don't trust the people of the world to do whats right and therefore the world won't always grow/ I am not an optimist , also here's a cookie if you did read my whole post there!!

I feel like politics is the (truest?) way of making real change. Unfortunately, I doubt that I can enter into politics and I also doubt that people in my area would vote for me. I bet that they would much likely more follow racial, caste based issues rather than tackling real things. And I doubt I will ever get funding from someone for speaking against the absolute rich in my country. maybe my life would be in danger, that's more likely. My appearance is also really nerdy and I love tech. I doubt if people would think of me as a leader. I loved giving speeches in class but I wonder if I can bring real change in the system.

To me, its this system that feels so convuluted man. Like we have freedom and not at the same time. Do we have the freedom to bring real change?-> I feel yes But can I bring real change though? -> Maybe Is it worth trying? -> I don't know

I feel like news essentially boils down to the is it worth trying? option. No need to be a hero, I feel like I wanted to be different / mature so followed news, but I mean, from a completely logical point of view, Idk man.

This is what I have in question. Is it worth trying to do discussions and bring a political reform as to what I believe/ experts say at the same time into reality. Like georgism, nuclear etc. Is it worth discussing these things even though they might be a headache but maybe the mere discussion of them increases their likelihood of being spread and maybe adopted. Are my thoughts having a real impact.

I feel so tiny in this world man. I feel like money buys influence but I am not a sociopath who can play a billionaires game for my "good" political ideas to be implemented, and If I become something like that, then what's the difference b/w me and them.

I feel like a lot of billionaires are freeloaders. NO Matter how much risk you take, it shouldn't be rewarded as such. It almost feels like the freemarket isn't efficient in this sense. I genuinely don't know :/, but the fact that you can almost buy presidencies is... wild.

Should I still watch the news? like, uh, are you getting what I am feeling? I feel like I can't bring real change so why bother but a part of me believes that the fact that I am saying it is wrong and needs to be proven wrong. I wish to be an optimist, I wish for the world to be saved, because I see people suffering. I wish to bring an impact, or maybe die trying. Would the french revolution had happened if people gave up on news? Or have the people getting news from sources whose only agenda is to stop anything like french revolution from happening (billionaires?) and they want us all to fight each other.

Man, I don't know, can we bring real change? I have seen people do it, but can I? Should I? I don't know. Its so messy and breaks my heart. Definitely hard to explain as I wish to be an optimist but am stuck being a pessimist/realist (almost murphy-esque in the sense that anything can happen, will happen) with my logical deductions.

The questions boils down to ,

is ignorance bliss? or should I pursue the truth of knowledge even if its bitter, maybe I can live my life built around that bitterness, that things are real, that I don't have to be an optimist. You have picked ignorance, and there is no wrong answer but I wish for a discussion so that someone can help me pick my answer.

[fouc]

You seem to believe that not following the news leads to ignorance?

My question to you is - Is following the news even a form of participation?

I would argue that news has an incredibly high noise to signal ratio. Most news anchors and talking heads and commentators talk a lot but convey very little. It's obvious they understand very little and ultimately focus on regurgitating what is "commonly understood" that everyone else also repeats. Plus usually there's heavy biases involved - so many implicit assumptions every time they open their mouth. Hardly any nuance is conveyed.

Anyways let's forget news for a second and discuss how to make some kind of impact, some kind of change.

To my mind at least 3 options occur to me:

1. Writing. Don't write to a wide audience, write to a narrow one. Really get in deep on a political issue.

2. Start local. Participate in town council, or similar, get involved as an active member in local politics to gain practice/exposure. Don't need to be a politician or be elected yet.

3. Or my favorite - focus on some technical solution for helping people to organize perhaps..

[Imustaskforhelp]

I mean I don't watch traditional news and more youtube from genuine indpendent journalists who are transparent about their reporting and even their company in general. (Tldr news) etc. and I am way more focused on the economy side of things.

I do watch a lot of atrioc and I think that he's a decent enough source to be trusted compared to journalists in the sense that I get both fun and news at the same time but yeah.

Like I said (I think) I am way more interested on things financially and so plain bagel who I consider to be an excellent finance youtuber who isn't a grifter and literally has no incentives to sell you a course or something. ( crazy that I feel like I have to mention it, that's how scummy most finance youtubers are)

Even then, even such amount of news which I consider to be a signal makes me depressed. I may have a left leaning bias but that's because of the incompetence of the govt. and I am not even an american but its interesting to watch american politics because it impacts us all and my countries politics is a shit hole that its not worth watching, both parties suck, (tbh america is same, bernie is the only person that I trust for the most part imo)

My point that I was trying to make is that maybe mass scale of people depress me with what is happening in the world. I wish to be ignorant but I wish to know if that makes sense.

Regarding 3rd point, to me 3) is also my favourite as I love finding technical solutions to organize/build etc., yet I find it that I am not an effective oranizer for stuff, maybe I am better off just helping non profits in their mission that might align with my political beliefs, but I wonder if I can do it without it being my full job or taking full time efforts. Like, decentralizing the communications by moving to matrix or helping them in self hosting their stuff comes to my mind. Does this make sense? Do non profits need this?

[bikamonki]

Let them be rich. Stoicism would recommend you not try to control what isn't in your hands to control; just accept it. Can you imagine that centuries ago, the same rules of class, power, and money drove society, and some very smart philosophers came to the right conclusions? Let it be. Meanwhile, those hands, freed from frustration and fear, can build the extraordinary.

[Imustaskforhelp]

Has nothing changed from thousands of years ago from the greek democracies though?

I thought that we have changed for the better, if not, then well, I am forced to accept it. But it is so fucking sad that we have to accept that same rules of money drove society and it would continue doing so. That's really fucked up if we think about it.