[alecco]

All this middle age crisis stems from having fewer children and even fewer grandchildren.

How to find meaning as childless person: help your relatives (Gen Z and Alpha are in crisis right now), help your community, donate blood, help disabled people, volunteer as firefighter. But above all, focus on doing it to people who are themselves pro-social.

Avoid sociopaths and alert people being abused. Just telling them something along the lines of "be careful with that one" is often enough to break the spell.

[jebarker]

I am not sure I agree with not having kids being the cause of mid-life crisis. But for balance, as the GP, I will say that I had two kids through the time that I adjusted my approach to life to this less goal oriented approach. They do provide direction to life, make many decisions easier (since I just choose what’ll be best for them) and provide constant distraction from consumption. They also provide an additional tension if you remain goal oriented though since now you have less time to sit and think about your goals and plans and that’s stressful too.

[patmorgan23]

Isn't the stereotypical middle age crisis the suburban office worker husband with two kids who buys a sports car to feel young and free?

[octo888]

In that stereotypical mid-life crisis, the kids have grown up/going off to college

[wat10000]

How do I find meaning as a child-ful person?

[alecco]

If you have time after work and family, those things apply just the same, of course.

[wat10000]

The children tend to make it so that I don't.

[alecco]

They will grow.

At one point in my life I was very busy with uni and full-time job. I listened to audiobooks, lessons, or just read my notes during commutes. And I was lucky to be allowed to study in my work breaks (away from the "watercooler gang"). I made time. I was very picky with who I spent time with and made sure the human interaction was high quality. Those were some of my most productive years for my side/fun projects. And I was never bored.

Life is not short. We waste most of it in meaningless time sinks. (BTW, thank you for making me remember this)

[jhanschoo]

> Life is not short. We waste most of it in meaningless time sinks. (BTW, thank you for making me remember this)

By any chance have you read https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_Brevitate_Vitae_(Seneca) ? The sentiment expressed here is almost exactly what is expressed here.

[wat10000]

This seems directly opposed to the statement that “All this middle age crisis stems from having fewer children and even fewer grandchildren.”

[alecco]

Being busy acts like a pacemaker. All people I know with big families don't have mid-life crisis. They do get overwhelmed at times. But most have some hobby or passion. Sports, cars, wood-making, or side projects. Kids make you realize time goes by. It's harder to accept life moving on if you are alone. And you are more likely to fall for negative habits. In general, of course there are outliers at both ends of the curve.

In old-style charities people with families are a majority. But the fashionable new and ephemeral NGOs are usually full of singles (mostly posing). Again, in general.

And I should listen to my own advise. You are right. I am just another guy and shouldn't give advice on life to complete strangers, on the internet. Good night.

[butlike]

Yeah, but what about your needs?