[anonymars]

I'm not the person you were replying to originally, I was providing context for who Daryl Davis is and what he has done

That doesn't mean everyone else has to do the same thing, anymore than save the whales or end world hunger. Only that people aren't immutable and irredeemable and it's not fair to dismiss the idea of connecting with them as inherently ridiculous

[scarface_74]

Yes and because $TechFounder can drop out of school and become a multi billionaire, you can too. It’s “Survivorshio Bias” at its finest.

[anonymars]

"Have patience and try to understand people you disagree with, and they might be open to changing their mind" isn't an out-of-reach unicorn tech investment, it is a fundamental building block of effective human communication. Ask any good salesperson

[JustExAWS]

There is a huge difference between “I don’t agree with your stance on supply side economics or universal healthcare” and “I would just as well see you hanging from a tree as sitting here next to me” or “because you decide to love someone of the same sex, you are going to bring an end to this great nation and I will do everything I can to make your life miserable”,

I am not trying to “understand” anyone who thinks someone doesn’t deserve to exist.

[anonymars]

So don't. But why insist to everyone else that engaging with prejudice and changing people's minds is impossible?

[scarface_74]

Yet I bet you’re not going to try to do outreach to people you know want to see you or your family harmed just because of the color of your skin…

[anonymars]

Why do you assume that, and what is it you would like to achieve by saying so? Do you think I champion this because I've never helped someone become less prejudiced?

I'm sorry for what you've had to go through. But do you think the world will just change for the better of its own accord (or that it will never change for the better)?

[47282847]

The narrative of the college dropout turning billionaire is a myth, at least insofar as it ignores their already wealthy family background. Nothing about survivorship in there.

[anonymars]

I believe the point is "here's how I dropped out of college and became rich, you can too" has the survivorship bias of "here are all the college dropouts who didn't become rich"

This is the case with most success story biographies because luck (including "be born to a rich family with connections") plays a large role, and many others who took similar actions did not have the same successful result, therefore the advice does not guarantee success

Of course the same could be said for any advice, because chance plays a role in everything

I think it's a valid question, though: are you going to fail with empathy 9 times out of 10? 99 times out of 100? 999 times out of a thousand? And so on.

I'm not sure what the answer is, but what I do think is it has better odds than telling people what they are supposed to think.

What about shunning people? Well, I think in the past that could have gone either way: their choice was to either fit in with society or be alone. But now, everyone can find their fringey flock, which I think is why flat earthers and moon landing hoaxers are more of a thing than they were. It's not as much about the beliefs as it is the social club.

[scarface_74]

Again, people are suggesting that I as a Black person should “empathize” with someone who doesn’t feel like I should get equal treatment, doesn’t belong in their space, etc.

But in today’s society, it’s not allowed for politicians or anyone to be openly hostile toward Black people. So they choose immigrants, non straight people or non Christians. Those people don’t deserve “empathy”.

[47282847]

I think what is happening often is people having different definitions of “empathy“. For me, it is “feeling with“, being in a shared space of feelings; it’s not a cognitive skill but emotional - they are equally human/living creatures and I can sense their underlying emotions and thus reason about their motivations. This means I can both empathize and have a different point of view. Empathy, for me, does not imply sympathy, agreement or submission.