[eumenides1]

Try not to beat yourself up too much about it, I certainly have and it hasn't been very useful to do so.

You have a finite amount of energy in a day and learning takes a lot of energy. It's why a kid's job is the learn.

You could try front running the learning, but it will impact your energy levels at work. It still takes a monumental amounts of discipline, but you may have the energy to make it work.